life in technicolour iii

You, are the apple of my eye

2011-11-08T01:26:00.006+08:00

In a parallel universe, we would have gone back in time to correct all the missed opportunities, all the mistakes that we may have made in life; but in our present reality, all we can do is just look back at those memories, smile fondly and move on with our head held high.

《那些年，我們一起追的女孩》 is a Taiwanese coming of age film that en-captures all the joy, laughter, pain and sorrow of growing up. A tender, heartwarming and touching film that has an incredible heart, it's a realistic and honest reflection of the trials and tribulations of growing up in the 90s, in an era that heralds the burgeoning of the information age, in a world before the influx of the internet and the expanse of technology that it brings. Things were simpler, more innocent then, and you get a sense that without technology, relationships and bonds were more realistic and honest as well.

Its a film that's amazingly well crafted, finely balanced in its ability to shift from incredibly hilarious laugh out loud moments of both unabashedly crude humour that the Taiwanese are well known for and subtle blink-and-you'll-miss-it jokes, to moments that are unbelievably poignant, touching and occasionally heart wrenching. And its ability to straddle both sides of the emotional spectrum lies not just in the palpable chemistry of its entire ensemble cast, but also in the sensitivities of the director/screenwriter/author of the film. There's no doubt that the cast of mostly young twenty-somethings, led by 柯震東 & 陳妍希, have done an incredible job here, but the true success of the film lies in Director 九把刀's directing abilities - the scenes are almost postcard picturesque, the storytelling and pacing were both controlled and elegantly executed, brilliant work from a director who's making his directorial debut with this solid effort.

The ending's bittersweet, but then again, I found it extremely satisfying and realistic. On hindsight, any alternative ending would probably have felt forced and contrite, and the film would probably lose an incredible level of depth and poignancy. Nonetheless, I left the theatre feeling more refreshed and satisfied that I've ever been in a long time.

In life, we are bound to leave behind a slew of missed opportunities and unfortunate mishaps. But the point of growing up is to look back on these memories and regrets, and learn from them and to make sure that when the future comes, we grow with our experiences and seize the moments that would change our lives for the better. The past can never be rectified, but should always be remembered and treasured. At the same time, we strive to live life to the fullest, to create new memories and not regrets. And that, to me is the challenge of life. =)

Oh Oscar, Oscar Oscar!

2011-02-26T22:55:00.004+08:00

The Oscars are fast approaching, and I find it extremely ironic that the first ever chance I have to watch them "Live" has to content with the fact that I'm just 8 days away from a potentially life-changing examination. Oh bugger. And did I mention that this year's the first time that Channel 5 isn't screening it 'Live' as well?!? When I get the opportunity to watch it "Live", Channel 5 chooses to screw with me and decides not to screen it! What's up with that! Is this a sign that Karma's just not on my side?!?!

Anyway, there's no secret that I am totally rooting for 'The Social Network' to win Best Picture and Best Director at this year's Oscars. But I wanted to watch 'The King's Speech' as well because I wanted to size up the competition, and also to find out if it was really better than 'The Social Network', considering that it beat 'The Social Network' in so many other major award ceremonies. So I decided to go watch it.

The truth is, I liked it. 'The King's Speech' is an uplifting movie, the kind of movie that Oscar voters definitely love. It reminded me of 'The Queen' that was released a couple of years ago, a film that was incidentally, about the current Queen, Queen Elizabeth II, who just happens to be the daughter of the King featured in 'The King's Speech'. Nonetheless, 'The Queen' also found Oscar gold. 'The King's Speech' has an inspiring and relatively simple plot - the real life story of His Majesty, King George VI's attempt to overcome his outward stammer and inward fears, to find the courage to step out of his father's and brother's shadow and to find the conviction to be a great King and lead his weary nation in her desperate time of need. It is an awe-inspiring and truly humbling tale that sheds new light on the amount of courage, dignity and strength that the British Royal Family must possess to rule. Its hard not to find new found respect for the Windsors, even if their recent and modern antics would provide their detractors with tons of ammunition against them.

'The King's Speech' works because of the superb acting craftsmanship of its principal cast. Colin Firth is amazing as His Majesty, King George VI. While he looks nothing like the late King at all, his subtle take on portraying the King's complex feelings is just pure genius. Its not the realistic stutter that crowns his glorious performance, but the subtle hints into the King's hidden feelings of fear, pain, anger and frustration that he allows to surface throughout the film, that truly renders him the favourite to win the Best Actor trophy in the upcoming Oscars. Geoffrey Rush's performance as the Australian speech therapist Lionel Logue is also brilliant, his confident,eccentric, patient and calm Logue, a perfect foil to the frustrated and conflicted King. Helena Bonham Carter's Queen Elizabeth, wife to the King (and mother of the current Queen Elizabeth II) was surprisingly warm and motherly, which is a welcome change from the usually over the top characters that she likes to play. Nonetheless, she manages to inject a little tinge of cheekiness into her portrayal of the Queen, which is in keeping with the fact that the late Queen was indeed well known for her sharp wit and quotable quotes.

Without this strong cast, the film wouldn't have done so superbly. As a film, it is well made, touching and inspiring, a perfect feel good movie that just spells Oscar gold, though the only gripe I have with it is that it does feel, at times, rather too lengthy and draggy for its own good. Still, it has swept many of the major awards during the pre-Oscar award season, turning it into THE front runner at this year's Oscars, with 'The Social Network', the initial favourite now becoming the Underdog film trying to score an upset. In many ways, this year's battle has evolved into a battle of the Traditionalist versus the Progressive: The traditional, inspiring, grand and stately film that is 'The King's Speech' versus the sleek, intelligent, youthful and slightly radical film, 'The Social Network'.

I'm inclined to support 'The Social Network' in this two way battle. I feel that while 'The King's Speech' was a genuinely good movie, 'The Social Network' was simply downright spectacular. I've never felt so invigorated by a movie in a very long time. It was well crafted, well acted and so brilliantly edited into this incredibly smart, sexy and intense film - such a ground breaking film that made film making feel exciting again. I feel that 'The King's Speech' winning would be a very safe victory. And while it was a great film, it just didn't have that added oomph that 'The Social Network' had. No question about it. It didn't have that extra spark that 'The Social Network' had, and that undoubtedly made me love the former even more.

I feel that David Fincher, the Director of 'The Social Network' should win Best Director as well. I feel that it was more technically challenging to make a fast-paced, frenetic film like 'The Social Network' than 'The King's Speech'. To be able to interpret an awesome, brainy, technically-invasive script like that of 'The Social Network' and to envision the kind of film that it eventually turned out to be is just evidence of the man's incredible talent. David Fincher deserves the Best Director trophy, much more that Tom Hooper, director of 'The King's Speech'.

In terms of who I want as Best Actor, I'm so horribly torn. A big part of me knows that Colin Firth will win it (and understandably so because after watching his performance, he truly deserves it.) But I'm such a huge fan of 'The Social Network' star Jesse Eisenberg, that a HUGE part of me wants him to score an upset as well, even if the odds to that are exceedingly low. But oh Jesse! You are so freaking talented I hate to see you lose! Argh. Then again, you'll probably hate winning and having to go up on stage to make an awkward speech, and with your prodigious talents, you'll probably be nominated again for some other role real soon. So even if you don't win it this year, you'll get it soon! And I'll still be obsessed over you! You and your freaking talent and awkwardness! Sigh.

In terms of Best Screenplay - Aaron Sorkin is going to win hands down for 'The Social Network'. He has swept every single screenplay award and the Oscar is just waiting to be handed to him. His script was AWESOME. JUST FREAKING AWESOME. Such brilliant lines, such intriguing and witty conversations. Double sigh.

Best actress - Natalie Portman for Black Swan. I'm just wondering if she'll go into premature labour while on stage accepting the award. It'll be so cool if that happens!

Hmmmm.... I don't really care for the other awards. Let's just see who wins them on the 27th! Can't wait! Oh Oscar, Oscar Oscar!

An Ode to AMMM-BEEE-BEEE-ASSS

2011-02-18T19:24:00.003+08:00

An Ode to AMMM-BEEE-BEEE-ASSS
My neurons are firing,
My senses are tingling,
But I can't seem to find my way.

Through the haystacks of knowledge,
The nonsense learnt in college,
Will someone help chase them away?

I wish I had a button,
That I could press and turn into a Titan,
That would certainly make my day!

For the Gods have their whims,
When it comes to examining limbs,
Leaving us, mere mortals sweating in dismay...

Still I'll punch Gustilo and Reiter
I'll crunch Trousseau and Klinefelter
And return like a King in May!

But the truth's that I really have no clue,
With regards to breaking the rules,
And til then, I can only pray.
___________________________________________________

Just a little something that I thought of while taking a 20 min train ride to KKH on Wednesday. Many thanks to Theresa for adding in a stanza and being a pseudo-editor, and the rest of CG 22 who thought it was amusing - thank you for entertaining my moment of madness/boredom. =)

So today's the last day where we are allowed to be in the wards. Come tomorrow, we will be barred from the wards of all public hospitals for two weeks, as they scramble to set things in motion for the start of the 20 day long AMMM-BEEE-BEEE-ASSS. A part of me is glad that the days of splitting ward commitments and mugging is over; now its really time to just lock myself up and eat/drink/breathe my notes. Still, it is with a heavy heart that I bid thee farewell! I will especially miss my M5 cg-mates! Despite it being dark and tough times, I had fun working and playing with everyone of you and I can't wait for the day where we can finally let loose and be glad that everything is over! Til then, all the best and take care in the remaining two weeks! Let's rock this! Woooo-hooo!

"You're not an asshole, Mark. You're just trying so hard to be. "

2011-02-01T23:06:00.008+08:00

I know I'm a hundred years too late writing a review of 'The Social Network', especially since the movie was released in October last year, but I've got to admit that I'd only just watched it. (I was feeling manic today after my Psychiatric medicine EOPT and promptly went on a shopping spree: I don't know what got into me, but I spent a total of $310 dollars on books, DVDs and clothes in just 2 hours. I have no idea how I'm going to explain that much purchases to my mum.)

Anyway, one of the DVDs I bought just happened to be 'The Social Network'. I just finished watching the film (instead of dutifully sitting down and continue the mugging for my impending, DARE-I-SAY-IT, EMMM-BEEEE-BEEEEE-ASSSSSS examinations) and I just got this sudden urge/impulse/inspiration to blog about it. Yes, I absolutely freaking loved the film (because its such a typical film that nerds like me would like). Its such a brilliant film, well made, well scripted, well acted out. Perhaps the only weak point was the fact that Justin Timberlake was in it and I sincerely hope that he'll just stay with his day job of singing. Barring that, it was perfect. Jesse Eisenberg was GENIUS, just pure talent and genius oozing out of his every pore. Andrew Garfield was so genuine and sympathetic as the best friend who got betrayed big time that I REALLY wanted to punch everyone for him.

No one will ever know if the events of 'The Social Network' were real. Chances are the gist of it was true, but the details were overly dramatized for the sake of adding lots of extra oomph to it. The film portrays Facebook Founder Mark Zuckerberg as a socially awkward, stunningly brilliant, somewhat conniving, manipulative ass-hole. I highly doubt that the real Zuckerberg is that flawed an individual. Nonetheless, despite all the flaws that Movie-Zuckerberg had, the last scene betrays the fact that this was a guy who was utterly lonely in this world. He created a phenomenon that was meant to make it easier for everyone (and anyone) to connect with each other, but the greatest irony was that he had absolutely no one to connect to. I found it so heart breaking when he starts to realized it after betraying his one and only best/true friend. But its the last scene of the movie, when he truly realizes that all he wants desperately is to be accepted and to be forgiven by the girl who started this whole chain events, that particularly shines. Its so poignant, absurd even, but strangely, so touchingly moving.

For all its technical brilliance and intelligence, "The Social Network" is a movie that's especially good because it has a heart to it and its so relevant to. It takes something that's so ubiquitous in our life right now and uses it to juxtapose the opposing ideas of alienation and connectivity. Its a social commentary on the state of communication today, how the advent of social media has effectively given people a means of shielding themselves from the true need to communicate with one another, and in certain ways, caused a destruction in the ways of communication. We like to see ourselves as being more connected when we use such devices like Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, Friendster but all we are doing is simply typing to an inert machine that says things only because we are directing it to. Where's the sense in that? And isn't it ironic that the greatest revolution in connecting people was created by an individual who had so much problems relating and communicating and just connecting with the majority of the people around him?

That said, I think the reason why I was so particularly affected by this film is probably due to the fact that I see aspects of myself in Movie-Zuckerberg. First of all, I would like to clarify that I'm nowhere as intelligent and brilliant as he is, because the last time I checked, I'm most definitely not. Secondly, I would also like to think that I'm nowhere as manipulative and rational and stone-heartedly cold as him (though I'm probably as sarcastically mean as he is.) Lastly, I do not think I am as socially inept as he is (And I sincerely hope that to be true.) That said, the way Movie-Zuckerberg deals with people, the way he hides behind the layers of codes and codes like they serve to be some sort of divine protection, the way he uses sarcasm as a weapon, his somewhat callous attitude with regards to sacrificing personal relationships to further his own cause or desires, somewhat reminds me of... well me. I don't think I'm as crystallized as he is, but the same modus operandi seems to be in order. Just the skeleton, but not the flesh.

The truth is, like Movie-Mark, I use nonchalance, avoidance, cold-biting sarcasm as a defence (?offense) mechanism because I'm afraid of interacting with people really. I flutter around, hoping no one sees/notices me, and when they do, I've got this compulsive urge to just say some wise crack that instantly freezes everything and therefore allows me to ran away from the situation. And even when I'm around people I'm familiar with, I still have to fight the urge to say something or let an expression slip because sometimes I wish I weren't in a social situation. People don't seem to notice it, but most of the times, I wish I could just coop myself at home and dabble with my computer all day.

I've never been someone who handles one-on-one relationships properly. I prefer interacting with people as a group, because I much prefer reading cues among people, than reading cues of an individual. It gives me more room to maneuver and possibly slip away unnoticed. I also fear one-on-one connections, because I really suck at them. On one hand, I've always wished I'd one best friend, like Mark's Eduardo, who trusts you implicitly and is always there to watch your back. But I know that I secretly fear such relationships, because to me they represent one way streets that are so hard to turn back, especially when an accident happens and you are caught in a jam of a car wreck. And I know because I've screwed up one or two of such relationships before and I know that I'll rationalize them to no end, and I'll conclude quite stubbornly, (whether I'm right or not), that I'm not at fault and that I refuse to be caught in such emotional quagmires and I'll turn my back and walk away forever. Sort of like how Movie-Mark walked out of Movie-Eduardo.

So I have my GROUPS of close friends. My many cliques that I maintain (whether via mental segmentation or actual physical segmentation), groups of people that I enjoy interacting with, feel familiar and comfortable with. Groups which allow me more room to maneuver, to hide behind humour, to defend myself, to retreat in fear. Because I sometimes fear connection. I really do. But yet, like Movie-Mark, I sometimes desperately desire it too.

I'm highly aware of the fact that this has degraded into a rambling about me and my issues. I apologize for these incessant, unnecessary ramblings. But when a movie as good as the Social Network comes along, its hard not to be stimulated by it. Hence the ramblings.

I suddenly find myself unable to find more things to add here. I've ran out of things to comment of. I think I'll end here.

Awkward.

Cause we need a little Christmas now!

2010-12-24T12:18:00.003+08:00

The fact that Christmas is here tells us many things:
1. The year 2010 is fast becoming yesteryear and the year 2011 is fast becoming reality.
2. Time flies, even when you aren't having fun!
3. People are gonna panic. Period.
4. Orchard is not going to be a safe place anymore. (Not that it was ever safe in the first place!)
5. The Nights are going to be colder, wetter, longer but more magical.

More importantly, the fact that Christmas is here serves as a reminder that there's so much to be thankful for. No matter how busy or screwed up you deem your life to be, we mustn't forget that there's always a life outside of this mugging bonanza, that there's always light in the darkness of everybody's life. So why not just kick back and relax on this very special day? Do something worthwhile! Enjoy your time with family or friends! Catch a feel good sappy movie! Or just enjoy a nice peaceful night on the rooftop, watching the stars shine!

Because goodness knows that, once in awhile, we all need something special in our tragic little lives to hold on to. Lest we be soul-less automatons that can't achieve anything beyond enslavement of mind, body and soul. =]

Merry X'mas everybody! Don't let the Reindeer bite!

and we will one day walk in bitter rain

2010-10-03T21:08:00.002+08:00

This weekend has been one of the most trying ever. Its been both mentally and emotionally draining.

Once again, we bear witness to the extreme fragility of life. It brings back memories of the days in Secondary school, where our batch also faced a similar tragedy. I remember very vividly, the tears that some of my close friends had upon attending the wake, and I remember standing there, at a total loss for words, not knowing what to do to make the grief better. 7 years on, and I find myself facing a similar situation, though this time, the emotions are amplified a hundred times over. Because unlike the previous incident, this happens to involve a person with whom I'd known, someone whom I had spent 6 years of my school life, growing up together, making music together; together we were gunning for golds. I remember sitting just diagonally across him in the Orchestra, remember the brief conversations that I had with him throughout these 6 years, remember the cheerful, shy almost bashful smile he gave everyone when he greeted them.

Admittedly, we hardly had much contact since we graduated from junior college. I've never been close to him like how some others were. But nonetheless, it still hurts to know that gentle soul that I first met when we were precocious 13 year olds isn't here with us anymore. And it hurts me more to know that it was such a needless loss, a loss that shouldn't have happen, but yet, a loss that was probably beyond all of our control. Why it happened, perhaps we will never know. But what I do know, is that this has left a void in many people's hearts and perhaps, we will never ever dare view life in such a frivolous manner again.

"When the cold of winter comes
Starless night will cover day
In the veiling of the sun
We will walk in bitter rain

But in dreams
I can hear your name
And in dreams
We will meet again

When the seas and mountains fall
And we come, to end of days
In the dark I hear a call
Calling me there,
I will go there
And back again" - 'In Dreams' from the "Fellowship of the Ring'

One day, we will all walk together in bitter rain. Til then, you'll live on in our hearts and minds, while you find happiness where we cannot follow.

But have no doubt, you will be sorely missed.

Day Eight: Three turn ons

2010-09-18T00:23:00.003+08:00

As you have probably inferred, I have lost all motivation to continue with this meme list thingy. (Though that pretty much sums up my attitude with regards to most of my leisurely pursuits these days. Sigh.) But at the behest of certain people, I shall continue to slough on with this darn list and shall strive to have it completed by say, this weekend? (Don't count on it though.)

Here goes. Today's list is another killer! (Not in a good way though!)

Day Eight: Three Turn Ons
Sigh. Seriously? Ok. I'll try to take this list seriously. Like serious seriously. Here goes.

1. Girl, be a freakin' human. I'm not into the whole bestiality shit. Neither am I interested in being one of those crazy people who marry a ghost bride or something. No akumas, demons, zombies, aliens or anything of that sort. I mean, I could see myself controlling an army of such beings, but to get aroused by them, isn't really my thing. Yeah.

2. Chocolate. In liberal amounts. Lots of chocolate makes me happy, and when I'm happy, I get high, and when I get high, my filter shuts down and when my filter shuts down, I thing crazy stuff and some of these crazy stuff aren't necessary PG friendly. Hurhur. I'm mad really.

3. ...... I dunno. Don't have body parts that are obviously like... made of plastic? I get really turned off by plastic/synthetic body parts. They freak the hell out of me. I like people au natural. 100% au natural. I don't want to spend my time with a plastic blow up doll really.

That's all. Really crude. Gotta be due to the chocolate dessert and chocolate drink I had after dinner. Hehehehehehe.

Day Seven: Four turn offs.

2010-09-12T01:01:00.002+08:00

And as an added bonus, here's another entry. As a continuation of that meme challenge, here goes.

Day Seven: Four turn offs.
1. Don't be so whiny and needy, or be incredibly self-absorbed. I cannot stand whiny or needy people. People who need constant attention 24/7 are people who have the potential to bug the hell out of me. They just completely turn me off. If you can't talk about anything else other than 'Me Me Me!' or your hundred and fifty seven dis-pleasures regarding life on Earth, then please do not come to talk to me or even better, do not get to know me. You won't like me at all!

2. Don't be so competitive and harp all day about results. I think people who get overly competitive about every single thing in life really need to learn how to chill and relax. Take a step back and you'll realize that you don't have to be victorious in every single thing in life. Life isn't meant to be a bed of roses. You have bad days where you aren't the champion. So what? Just go smell the carnations instead. They are pretty flowers too.

3. Arrogance is such a big turn off. Its okay if you are confident about your own abilities and you show it in a polite and controlled manner. But to behave as if you are the biggest piece of shit in the world is another matter altogether. Some people act as if they are superior to others just because they know a little more about something or can do something better than others. I wanna tell these people that its not your abilities that people will remember you by; its the way you behave among others and what others think of you that matters more in life. No point being the greatest clinician of all time if everyone thinks you are the biggest, most pretentious prick in the world and can't be bothered to even consult you!

4. Being manipulative, but not being good at it. I think its actually okay to be manipulative, especially if you are good at it, because people wouldn't actually know that you are being manipulative. But to be manipulative and not able to actual cover your tracks is just tragic. If you managed to manipulate everyone without anyone ever knowing, you'll be my hero. If you attempt to manipulate everyone, only to fail spectacularly, then you're just a loser really. Boo hoo.

and so it ends...

2010-09-12T00:43:00.010+08:00

I'm currently high on Mocha right now, so I decided to get this entry up and running while I'm in creative and chatty mood. Just came home from Hwachong's annual MAF. I've got to be honest, this is probably going to be my last year attending MAF. I know I've been contemplating that every year, but after 6 different MAFs, I think this is really it. Its not that MAF has lost its meaning, its just that I think its time for me to take a step back and let it all go. Its time to accept that I've got to embark onto my adult life and to really venture out into the wild and crazy world. Every year MAF serves as some sort of escape route from facing the realities of growing up, where once a year, you can just go back to a school that's my Hogwarts, to feel safe being surrounded by its 4 walls, but I really think its time I stopped relying of this sort of escapism.

I know that I'll probably miss MAF, but the fact is, with each passing year, I feel that there's a new generation of Hwa Chongians who will come back to Hwa Chong and keep the spirit and the flame alive. Its really time for us to hand that torch to them. We'll work to keep that flame burning in a different way, doing our part to build a better home, a better nation, a better world for the future generations to come.

So I've decided that this year's MAF will be my last. Maybe one day I'll decide to come back. But I foresee that that day won't be anytime soon. It probably be a day 10 years down the road, where I'm happily married and I'll bring my wife and kids down to see the tradition that made me so proud to be a Hwa Chongian. But til then, its goodbye MAF. Thanks for all the wonderful memories. You'll be a tradition that will live on and on.

"多年以后又再相逢
我们都有了疲倦的笑容
问一声我的朋友何时再为我吹奏
是否依旧是否依旧" - 细水长流

Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)

2010-09-04T23:55:00.002+08:00

Okay, I'm back because its the weekend and I am relatively well rested and free on weekends, therefore I'm more willing to blog. So here I am, with Day Six of this blasted list. Here goes.

Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)

Like one of my favouritest people in the world, I cannot seem to narrow it down to just 5 individuals. Therefore, I'll list it down into groups of people. Also, I've decided that I will not include my family in one of my five choices, because, to be honest, if I were to include members of my family in the list, I won't be left with many more slots to fill in really. So yeah, no family in this list!

1. GAG. What can I say? Its been a pleasure to have experienced life with the three of you kooky individuals. I'm really grateful to have met you all during JC and to have enjoyed 6-going-on-7 years of AMAZING friendship with the three of you, its been a blast really. I can safely say that these three are friends that I probably will never ever lose contact with, even as we all march on in different directions as we embark on adult life! You guys seriously rock. Like seriously.

2. 04s71. Now I know some people will feel that there's a bit of overlap between option 1 & 2, seeing as to how GAG and I are all from 04s71, but I got to admit that I sorta view GAG'D as a separate entity from the class. That said, I love 04s71 and I'm glad to have been in such a unique blend of people. I'm still quite amazed at how well gelled our class turned out. I mean, we are all such different individuals, yet we somehow came together to form this special identity. And I'm sure that we'll still have reunions in the many years to come!

3. TCHSCO friends. This group of people were the first group of friends that I felt I belonged to. Granted that we hardly meet up as a group anymore, and I tend to only meet a few individuals a few times a year, but yeah, I must admit that they do mean a lot to me, more than I'll ever admit it. All the crazy (and admittedly childish) things we used to do are just hilarious. I don't think we'll ever have a true reunion anytime soon, but yeah, this bunch of people will always hold a special place in my heart.

4. XC. My XC family from Huang Cheng. Come to think of it, the time we spent together wasn't alot, but I think they were quality time, which probably explains why I'm still quite fond of this group of friends. I haven't seen everyone in ages! Gosh, how fast time flies! Everyone's everywhere, so much so its so hard to arrange a meet up! But yeah, XC will always be a group of people who mean alot to me.

5. Goldilocks. I came into medical school, without a place to sit in the LT, without a group to have lunch with, without a group of people to slog on with. Goldilocks was warm enough to extend a welcoming hand to me, and that was the beginning of a wonderful fairytale with this extremely gracious OG. I'm glad to have known them, every single member of Goldilocks, because they've all made my time in Medical school so much bearable, so much enjoyable, and made it so much more than just pure mugging.

Yeah, that's all for today! Let's see if I update tomorrow!

Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.

2010-08-30T23:32:00.002+08:00

Okay, I'm fully aware that I did not blog yesterday, especially when I promised to actually write my entry about YOG. But I was too tired yesterday and had to crash at around 10pm or else I would have started my Orthopaedics posting as a half dead zombie. So yeah, but at least I'm here with another list today. No YOG post as promised though, but hopefully I'll get that produced soon, maybe on a day where I manage to get off earlier from posting or something. We'll see.

Anyway, here goes!

Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
1. Quit Swimming. I think it was just me trying to validate my laziness, and unfortunately, it paved the way for a no-sports policy in the next 13 years of post-primary education. And now, I feel that urge to start taking up sports again, but I don't know if its too late. We'll see.

2. Taking up French instead of Japanese as a 3rd Language. I have no idea what transpired my mind then that convinced me to take up French as a 3rd Language, when on hindsight now, I am so much more suited for learning Japanese. Perhaps it was just me wanting to act sophisticated or something. But now, I sorely regret not taking up Japanese because I would have been sure that my interest in Japanese could be properly sustained by a healthy dose of anime & manga.

3. Studying in a Singapore University. I really wanted to go to an overseas university and to just dump that life long dream because I got into medicine was on hindsight, total madness. Nothing I can do about it anymore, but yeah, if only I didn't want to be a doctor then.

4. Deciding to continue with certain plans in M2/M3 involving the formation of clinical groups. I really should have listened to other people's misgivings/advice then about potential problems, but I was too idealistic then and I ended up being quite miserable during 2 years of clinical postings. And now, I'm so much more happy and carefree! Happy indeed.

5. Not joining choir or drama in JC/sec school. I think I'm too much of a wuss really, because I did chose the easier path during sec school and JC. I didn't dare try out for choir at all, even though I really wanted to sing. HAHA. In the end, I joined CO and Huang Cheng's backstage crew because well, they were easier choices/options to make. And even now in med school, I'm still too much of a wuss to try out for performances like Playhouse and stuff. And I probably never ever will. Haha. WUSS.

6. For being so open with regards to relationship issues. Haha. I think its self explanatory, but yeah, I think there were things/feelings that should have been better left unsaid and now that so much things are in the open, its kinda hard to work around these things. It feels like I'm stuck. I really shouldn't be so transparent anymore.

Okay, ward rounds at 730 tomorrow. Time to sleep. Night!

Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.

2010-08-28T23:00:00.004+08:00

I'm back! First thing's first, its part 4 of that quiz thing that's starting to annoy me because it feels like an obligation that I have to accomplish and I hate obligations. But oh well. Here goes.

Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Hmmmm. I foresee that this list is going to be quite difficult to complete, because my mind works at its best when its neurons are overstimulated and rapidly firing impulses in a totally chaotic and unregulated manner, so there are SO many thoughts that cross my mind that I don't really remember them. That said, I'm going to try my very best to recall as much of them as possible, and list down the more interesting ones here.

1. "Ah crap, what have I gotten myself into this time?"

2. "If I had continued swimming then, would I be much taller than I am today?"

3. "Okay, that's someone I recognize. I hope he/she doesn't notice me. Shit. He/She just noticed me. What should I do? Should I just smile/say hello/wave? Maybe I should just act as if I don't recognize him/her. Oh shit. He's/She's acknowledging my existence! Avoid eye contact and stop moving! Then maybe I'll blend into my environment. Oh shit, he's/she's walking up to me! Initiate evacuation protocol! RUN RUN RUN!"

4. "Ah shit. Some kid's sitting/standing next to me on the bus/MRT. I hope he/she doesn't notice that I'm extremely fearful of him/her. MUST AVOID EYE CONTACT AT ALL COST! Oh shit, I think he/she just smelled the fear in me! Die, must initiate evacuation protocol! RUN RUN RUN!"

5. "Auntie/Xiao Jie ... your fashion sense really CMI leh."

6. "Eh, this ______ (insert some random medical fact/condition) ah, really must know ah? MBBS will come out anot huh?"

7. "Woah, why this guy so handsome/buff/metro and dress so nicely one? Must be Gay."

Okay, I'm quite amused at myself, but I realize that the above thoughts really DO cross my mind very often. Haha. I think I'm mad. But its okay. That means I'm either a genius or a maverick. Take your pick. Kekekekeke.

YOG reflection piece to be up tomorrow! Oo-blah-di, Oo-blah-da, life goes on da! La-la-la-la Life goes on!

Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.

2010-08-27T23:29:00.003+08:00

Okay. You can stop rolling your eyes now. I'll have it be known that I'm a spineless individual who is extremely susceptible to the brain-washing machinations of the powers who rule this island city state in which we live in. As you would have probably have guessed by now, I am currently suffering from Post-YOG depression. I couldn't even focus on studying today because all I that I can think about is how the YOG has officially ended and how suck life is going to be right now. Listening to the theme song helps to alleviate some of the pain, so I'm going to post the video in today's post as well. Don't tell me I'm super slow in posting the song on this blog. I wanted to do so ages ago... just that I sorta forgot that I actually had a blog, and I was too ashamed to do so on that social experiment called *acebook.

Now that that's out of the way, let's go on with Day Three of the quiz-thing.

Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart
Hmmm... Today's topic is destined to be an interesting one. "Eight ways to WIN my heart". Ha. I doubt anyone would even want to attempt to do that. I don't have a clear idea of what these 8 ways would be, so I'm just going to wing it and we'll see where we end up from here.

1. You have to be shorter than me. I'm sorry. I'm a vertically challenged boy, and no matter what others might say, height matters. I have a fragile ego and being taller than me would just utterly crush me. HA. Nah. That's not the real reason. (At least not the major one.) I think its just not visually & biologically appealing for the boy to be shorter than the girl. So yeah. I'm a prude that way.

2. Be smart & intelligent. Intelligence is sexy, even in girls. (Why am I being so sexist here!?!?) But yeah, I think I would fall head over heels for a girl who can challenge me mentally - come up with ideas/view on life that I never ever had before, engage me in a mental duel of sorts, and occasionally trounce me. That's going to be such an attractive quality.

3. Not be an overbearing, whiny *itch. Some girls just annoy me because they keep going on and on about the most frivolous things in life and expect things to be served to them on a golden platter. And the way they demand for your service or attention is so mind-f*ckingly rude that I really don't see a need to be even polite to them.

4. Have some kind of hobby/interest/activity that you are really passionate or skilled in. I actually like learning new things and if you are so passionate in something that you manage to get me interested in it as well, then you would have succeeded in influencing an extremely stubborn person and that's just freaking amazing.

5. Have a certain level of independence. I'm extremely independent and if there's one thing I fear the most is losing that independence and having some girl cling on to me 24/7. I need my personal space and time quite regularly and if you aren't able to give me that then I most probably won't be able to tolerate you. I just can't find the patience to deal with someone who needs my attention every single freaking moment. It'll drive me crazy.

6. Be able to tolerate my many quirks and eccentricities. I have to admit that I'm not an easy person to be in a long term relationship with. Haha. Heck, I'm terrible as a boyfriend really. I think I have a penchant for being quite unpredictable and ever changing, so if you can tolerate me, I'll probably give my heart and soul to you or something.

7. Be a lover of animals and nature. I cannot imagine not being able to enjoy nature with my girlfriend/wife. I definitely WOULD NOT like it if I went to Sungei Buloh with her and she keeps complaining about the mosquitoes or the weather. Or if she hates animals and thinks that global warming is just a theory. Or if she doesn't believe in doing her part to protect the environment and insists that we don't practice the 3 Rs. OR WORSE, she doesn't even know what the 3Rs are! I will seriously freak out.

8. Be someone who isn't afraid to occasionally lead the way. I think this stems from my tendency to be a bit lazy sometimes. I feel that in this age and day, both girls and boys should take equal share in taking the initiative. I get mildly irritated when girls still expect to be treated like a princess who expects the guy to plan everything during dates and only aims to complain when she doesn't like what was planned in the first place. Be confident and take the driver's seat at times. Its the age of gender equality man! Show me how great you are at being the boss, and I'll be smitten by you.

Okay, I'm finally done. Well, I don't think I managed to capture what I wanted to say properly, but yeah, the gist is there. I just barely managed to squeeze out 8 things to write about. Never thought that it'll be that difficult! But oh well, that's done and locked in. Not that it matters anyway. I'm sure that when the right girl comes, I'll know and whatever "criteria" that one used to go by wouldn't matter at all, even if she totally doesn't fit ANY of the above mentioned criterion. That's love. It makes fools out of all of us.

See ya again tomorrow then!

Day Two: Nine things about yourself.

2010-08-26T23:57:00.003+08:00

Today's the last day of the inaugural Youth Olympic Games held in Singapore. I can't help but feel a sense of utter disappointment that the Youth Olympics are over. 12 days have gone by so quickly. I did make a couple of trips down to watch some of the events 'live' but I do regret not having done so earlier. Then again, tickets weren't really made available til about halfway through the games so I wouldn't have been able to get tickets anyway. Still, its been such a pleasure viewing the games, both 'live' and from home. I have quite alot of thoughts and feelings with regards to the Youth Olympics, so I think I'll leave them to another entry, either tomorrow or over the weekend. But I'm going to miss it really.

That said, I'm here to complete day two of the quiz thing that I've embarked on. Here goes!

Day Two: Nine things about myself
1. I am a closet patriot. I'm usually not too vocal about my love for my country, but I tend to get unbelievably patriotic whenever I watch big national events like NDP, YOG and the likes. Even watching the F1 Grand Prix makes me proud to be a Singaporean. Also, I absolutely love the Singapore skyline. Its amazing. Marina Bay is shaping up to be a real beauty man.

2. I have a habit/superstition with regards to cutting my hair. I will never have my hair cut when I'm in the midst of studying for a major exam because I believe that each strain of hair lost to that pair of dastardly scissors, is equivalent to some little bit of knowledge lost. So yeah, I tend to have very messy hair when I sit for major exams.

3. My biggest vice is probably that of laziness. That's probably why I tend to leave most of my personal projects for the dead. That and oh, procrastination. Its a sad thing really. But I just can't see a solution round it that I'll like.

4. I also tend to be very extreme with regards to developing interests in things. I get obsessed over an idea/concept/sport/game extremely quickly and get bored with it even quicker. Haha. That's probably the reason why my personal interests and hobbies actually change so often and regularly, and that I'm always constantly looking for new things to get obsessed with. Its an endless cycle of everlasting boredom.

5. That said, I'm very different in my approach to work. I tend to be a bit stubborn with my approach to studies and would take an extremely pragmatic, no nonsense, dogmatic method to planning a study schedule and sticking to it. No questions asked.

6. I love to do things at my own pace. That includes traveling. My ideal vacation is to throw me to a country/city for a month or so and just allow me to take my time to explore and live in that country/city. That's the way I like it really.

7. I have drawn loads of stuff and written loads of stories/scripts/poems and lyrics but I've never ever showed them to anyone. I've even destroyed a box worth of these creations before. I think I create for my own pleasure, but being able to destroy these creations gives me even greater satisfaction. Perverse indeed.

8. I'm quite interested in stuff that's dark, kooky, morbid, even grotesque, but my view of life and the world in general, is actually quite optimistic and cheery. (This totally surprises me!) I think it helps that I'm so used to negative energies, such that they don't bother me these days and I'm able to just march on with life in my own peaceful little bubble of chakras that just emote positivity.

9. I admit that I'm a bit of a prankster. I sometimes rejoice in the misfortune of others, and wouldn't ever miss an opportunity to embarrass someone or make them squirm! YAY!

Okay. I'm dead beat. Time to sleep. Tata!

a blatant attempt to kick start this dead blog.

2010-08-25T23:57:00.005+08:00

Its now August and its been close to 2 months since I last blogged an entry here. I vaguely recalled that I wanted to follow up my last entry, which was a reflection of my days in London, with a reflection of my days in New York. Obviously, I've failed to do so. Haha. The draft of that entry's still in my hard drive actually, but obviously, I've been procrastinating alot and with the commencement of what is hopefully my last year in Medical School, time to really sit down and contemplate is probably going to be a luxury that's few and far between. So really, we'll see if I do decide to get that entry publish. Yup, we'll see.

To be honest, I don't think anybody really reads this blog anyway. But I'm currently in my insomniac phase again and I really can't seem to fall asleep so I decided to do some random internet surfing when I stumbled on an update on the blog of one of my favorite-st people in the whole wide world. Its one of those quiz things that I JUST CAN'T stop myself from wanting to complete it. So here goes.

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day Ten: One confession.

So basically, today's day one and I'm suppose to write down ten things that I want to say to ten different people. Here goes!

Day one: 10 things that I wanna say to 10 different people
1. Its okay that you didn't win a medal really! Work hard and don't ever give up! That's the spirit of a true champion. Other medals will come your way if you keep working at it.
2. I think you should do what your heart tells you to do, and not what my brain tells you to do. Cause your heart's really pure while my brain needs a cure. Haha.
3. I think you need help. Like serious help. Like serious, serious, serious help. In fact, I think you need it right now. Like RIGHT RIGHT NOW..... What are you still waiting for!?!?!?! GET HELP NOW!
4. I hope you had another good week at school! I feel guilty that I'm like gallivanting across YOG venues when I actually promised to help you out with school during these two weeks.
5. I think we should meet up more often. Like once every week. It'll give me something to look forward to. Plus, its always cathartic to talk to you guys. You guys really rock!
6. WHY IS YOG really ending? And ORTHO starting! And my 2 week study break is ending! WHY WHY WHY!
7. Eh I don't know if I can really get into residency leh. But I will still try. So really, you all should try to.
8. You guys should just make up. Its so strange to see you both not talking to each other in the way you used to.
9. Don't play with fire, unless you are really flamin' hot yourself and can really take the heat, or you just love the pain it causes you. Just don't come screaming when it gives you ugly scars, cause they ain't gonna be pretty!
10. Don't take my advice too seriously, because I sometimes say things with the aim of causing trouble, because I actually like seeing people in trouble. Sometimes. Not all the time. But yeah, I'm a poltergeist in disguise.

Okay. That's done. It wasn't of any help to my insomnia, because I'm still as energetic as ever. This is a reason why I hate long breaks. It totally screws up my sleep cycle. I'm tired but I can't SLEEP. I need to sleep. Lest I become a crazy red lobster. Argh. Ack. Shucks.

Yes It's Real Love, It's Real

2010-06-08T10:26:00.005+08:00

So today's the 8th of June and I've been back in Singapore for a week now. The past week's been great: and by that, I mean that I've accomplished much by slacking around at home, eating the local dishes that I've missed and of course, catching up with the people that I've so dearly missed as well. And I think I've finally gotten rid of the Jet Lag, which is a relief I tell you. I don't really know how I would function if I didn't get rid of the horrible desire to be sleeping at 3 in the afternoon (or to be awake at 3 in the morning!) Anyway, I feel fully rested and I think its time to finally put down my thoughts concerning my 2 month overseas stint into words. First up, my thoughts about my month in London!

"From this moment on I know,
Exactly where my life will go.
Seems that all I really was doing
Was waitin' for love." - "Real Love", John Lennon

I think the song above totally sums up my feelings when I was in London. There's no other way to describe my feelings for London, except that its just 'Real Love'.

This is my third time visiting London and at 4 weeks, the longest I'd ever stayed there. Considering the fact that I'd already visited the city twice before, I was worried that I'll get bored visiting the British capital again. After this trip, I realised that I probably won't ever get bored with London. There's just something about the place that revitalises me; everytime I step out onto the streets of London, I feel this 'fire deep inside, something bursting me wide open, impossible to hide' (LOL, a line from the song "Electricity" featured in "Billy Elliot: The Musical") But yeah, London has this quality to it that just reinvigorates me. Maybe its the architecture, maybe its the cobblestone streets, maybe its the way the British speak, the way they hold themselves with so much dignity and grace, maybe its the air, maybe its the weather, maybe its just a mix of everything, but London just has this great quality to it that makes it so attractive to me.

What do I love most about London? Probably the atmosphere of civility. I love the fact that the Brits are not the most friendly of people, but they are polite, reserved and civil. Classic stiff upper lip. They aren't as exuberant or unabashedly-in-your-face like the Americans, which totally scares (and sometimes irritates) me. Its the right kind of balance between minding your own business and respecting personal space, and being friendly, helpful and civic minded only when there is a need to. The Brits are like that - they offer to help only when you really seek their help, they speak to you only when they are spoken to, they are friendly to you only when you approach them in the first place; otherwise, they are just politely minding their own business, carrying on with their own preoccupations and their lives. I think I'm like that. Some people are so outgoing that individual boundaries no longer remain. It becomes scary, like an invasion of privacy. America tends to be like that - its a country of extremes. Britain and its people are more moderated - yes, that's the word. Moderation. Moderated civility. Just keep calm and move on. Its such a classic British approach to the world's problems, one that's practical, pragmatic and that I personally admire and would hope to adhere to. When there's something getting you down, just shut up, suck it up and move on. No point complaining and whining about it. A simple phrase that speaks volumes.

Another thing about London that I love, is that, just like New York, its a cosmopolitan, multi-ethnic city that doesn't isolate you, but its lacks the feeling of intimidation and claustrophobia that New York has. New York, with its endless sky scrappers, can be a lot to handle and grow used to. London doesn't have that feeling at all - its low rise buildings are quaint and personable in nature, never as intimidating as the towering sky scrappers and apartment blocks of New York. On top of that, cosmopolitan London never loses its unique sense of Britishness, which is something I feel that both New York and Singapore don't quite accomplish. The latter two cities are cities whose identity is sort of an amalgamation of the many ethnicities that inhabit them - if you strip away the layers, you'll realise that at the end of the day, there isn't much identity to talk about. London doesn't seem to suffer this problem. Its cosmopolitan, yet beneath all the many layers, it remains an essentially British city. It makes it very very unique - a city with so much depth and character and history, so many layers to explore but with a heart that's solidly British. Amazing.

This trip also made me realise how much I actually regret not being able to pursue a tertiary education in the UK. I think studying overseas would have drastically changed the way I am today as well. Granted that studying in medicine has probably had some degree of influence on the way I am today as well, but I think I would have benefited much more from an overseas education - not necessarily in terms of content, but in terms of developing independence and my global outlook and stuff. I do feel a certain degree of envy for my friends who had the opportunity to study abroad. In some sense, they are living the life that I had dreamed off when I was in secondary school, a dream that was derailed when I had that sudden inspiration in JC to get into medical school. If only I didn't attend that open house trip back when I was in J1 - I would probably be in a university in the UK now. Its amazing how the smallest of events and decisions can forever change the path of an individual.

I enjoyed my one month in London tremendously. This one month has forever sealed my love for one of the most cosmopolitan, yet distinctly unique cities in the world. Its my home away from home. I'm definitely going back to London for more visits in the future, and if possible, a longer stay there. Maybe I'll work there, maybe I'll live there for awhile, I dunno. But one thing is for sure: this love affair with this city will forever play a part in the remainder of my life.

if only we could dissect everything.

2010-05-19T23:51:00.002+08:00

This is my first entry in almost 2 months, and I've felt like I've been on an amazing life changing journey since that entry dated 2nd April. I'm still in New York, the Big Apple. The city's great, but I definitely miss London more. There's something about New York that fascinates me, but after awhile, it really gets onto you. Its not that good a place to live in, and when you are up against a place like London, a place that I love so much, a place that holds such a special place in my heart, New York really kinda flounders. But its still a great exciting place to visit.

I'm currently typing this entry at Mt Sinai's library now. I guess I'm really supposed to be in Surgery right now, but to be honest, I don't know if I can stand to observe or scrub in to another surgery here. The surgery I was supposed to go for is an Aterio-venous fistula creation, something that I've seen over 4 times during my stay here and I seriously do not want to watch another again. I don't understand these Americans though. They expect us to keep watching the same surgeries over and over again and when we choose not to, they grumble that we should do so because that's the whole point of residency. But we AREN'T on residency! Surgery's BORING. Oh my god. I wanna stick a scalpel in their Jugulars. And then they go on about how everything here's our choice. And when we make a choice that's the opposite of what they expect us to do, they grumble. Typical American style democracy: you can choose what you want, but as long as its not the same decision as theirs, its not a good decision.

I think Americans are much too intense for their own good. Its not as if they are super stellar or outstanding; they are about as efficient as the British, and that's not a compliment either. But I like the British way of doing things more - they have a more relaxed, more reserved way of making decisions and accepting decisions. I think Britain rules. Here everyone treats the patients so aggressively, I sometimes wonder if they're killing them instead. Its horrendous, unethical even. I dunno, I'm glad I came on this posting, because I'm convinced that I would NEVER ever want to work in the USA. The system's just not for me. Its a very enterprise like system, too commercialized, to business-like. I pray that Singapore's health care system isn't evolving to something similar, because it certainly isn't the right way to go.

I have so much thoughts about these two months. One day, I'll have to settle myself down to properly make sense of it all. Time to grab lunch. Tata!

Hello, Goodbye!

2010-04-02T18:09:00.002+08:00

Hello, Goodbye - The Beatles
You say yes, I say no
You say stop and I say go, go, go
Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello

I say high, you say low
You say why, and I say I don't know
Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello

Why, why, why, why, why, why
Do you say good bye
Goodbye, bye, bye, bye, bye

Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye I say hello
Hello

Hela, heba helloa
Hela, heba helloa
_____________________________________________

WELL. THIS IS IT!
Lalalalalalalalalalalalala!

I'm off your the next ten weeks or so, gonna dabble in a little Western style living. First to enjoy the old-school charm of dapple London, and then the revolutionary zeal of eclectic New York. I hope I've brought enough clothes to last me 10 weeks but then again, I hope that my luggage isn't overloaded. Yeah. Haha

I can't wait to roam the streets of London again! Woo hoo!

dragons, down the rabbit hole

2010-03-24T23:37:00.005+08:00

I recently had the time to watch not one, but TWO visually stunning movies, in 3D no less! But while both were visually a treat to watch, one was crap, while the other was fantastic.

Ever since I had first caught wind of the fact that Tim Burton was set to film his own adaptation of 'Alice in Wonderland', I have been dying to watch it. I mean, who better to film such a whimsical, eccentric tale as Alice In Wonderland, than the master of eccentricities and quirkiness himself, Tim Burton! Stunning cinematography and visual effects aside, Tim Burton's 'Alice in Wonderland' is a horrible disappointment. A tragic failure. A movie so ridiculously bad, even the acting prowess of a stellar cast which includes the likes of Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter and Anne Hathaway can't save. I watched 'Alice' feeling like I was watching a kindergarten play that was created haphazardly in a matter of hours - it was disorganized, it was frenetic, it was nonsensical. Maybe that was the whole point of the movie really, to be as nonsensical as possible - afterall, it is WONDERLAND, a place where everything and anything seems possible and liable to go awfully wrong. But know, it was a painful experience watching this movie and I had to struggle to curb the urge leave the theatre half way through it. Honestly, its been a long time since I had ever felt this way with regards to any movie! A great achievement really!

ANYWAY, the main thing I hated about 'Alice' was the way Tim Burton turned an original movie that was whimsical, kooky but sophisticated into a superficial, pointless retelling that had no heart to the story at all. The script was the killer - the plot was paper thin and highly highly contrived, the lines were awfully bad, the jokes were awfully flat. It didn't feel like there was a story at all, which is awfully sad because every good movie tells a fantastic story. Without a good story, your movie sucks really. At the end of the day, there just wasn't any point with this retelling of the classic story of 'Alice' at all. Just a pointless, unnecessary movie - it feels as though Tim Burton only made this movie to jump onto the 3D bandwagon made popular due to the tremendous success of Avatar so as to make tonnes of money. If doesn't feel as though he placed much effort into making this movie at all. Ultimately, what you get is a film that's perfect on paper, but went awfully wrong in its execution. Definitely one of the biggest disappointments of all time.

Now onto the film that I ENJOYED! Dreamworks' 'HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON' is FANTASTIC. I think I enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed Avatar! While it certainly left me wishing the movie was longer than its actually length, and also hoping that sequels would be produced. But anyway, this movie totally rocks my socks and I strongly recommend it. I'm so glad I got to watch this movie before flying off to the UK and US though, because I don't think I would be willing to fork out money to watch movies in these countries - movie tickets cost a bomb there!

'How to train your dragon' has quite a classic, simple storyline. Its your typical coming of age story, about a young Viking boy called Hiccup who find's himself as sorta an outcast in Viking society: here he is, a smart, funny, scrawny kid living in a society of brawny, gruff, uncouth Men who hunt dragons for a living. (Sorta like me living in this world really. Sigh.) As he desperately tries ways to fit in by attempting to kill a dragon, he unwittingly befriends one and ultimately changes the course of his tribe's existence and becomes the hero that he was destined to be. Its a very very overused but realistic story, the subplots of Boy&Pet, HeroicFather vs WimpySon and GeekgetsFierceGirl also adding to the cliche factor of this movie. But what it has, is amazing depth and heart. I think every human looks a good story about relationships, whether its between Boy&Girl, Child&Parent, Man&Beast or in this case, all three kinds of relationships. Everyone would come out of this movie wishing he had his own Night Fury to fly on. But its not all a happy ending fairy tale - I love the bittersweet ending of this film. Its not tragic, but there's a tinge of realistic sadness at the end of it.

The visuals in this film are just awesome. The long epic shots of Hiccup riding his dragon Toothless are reminiscent of the beautiful aerial shots of Jake flying in his Banshees in Avatar. In fact, come to think of it, the plot of 'Dragon' is sorta like that of Avatar! But that aside, 'Dragon' is a good film too, because it also preaches so many other things that are relevant to modern society - Peace vs Violence as a way to settle problems, respecting nature vs destroying it, intelligence vs brawn. I think everybody should strive to be like Hiccup. Very often society doesn't need another person who conforms to it - what society really needs is someone who dares to be a radical, who dares to be totally different, who dares to move in the opposite direction, to take that bold step to be somebody different - and in doing so, discover that life and society doesn't always have to be the way it is. As Hiccup exclaims in the movie about the dragons, 'everything we know about you guys is wrong!' I think there are many truths out there that are only temporal and will eventual be proven to be wrong. Its up to those rare few with THE GIFT to revolutionize the way we see, do or think.

Ultimately, 'How To Train Your Dragon' is a film that appears childish on paper, but is extremely mature in its execution. Its a film that's adventurous, fun and a delight to watch. I hope that we'll see this dragons again because they provide a hell of a roarin' good time.

無眠

2010-03-18T22:40:00.003+08:00

無眠
【曲/史俊威　詞/吳青峰、林暐哲】
今阿日月娘那這呢光
照著阮歸暝攏未凍睏
連頭毛都沒休睏

你甘知阮對你的思念
希望你有同款的夢
咱兩人做陣返來那一天
互相依偎的情愛

底你的心肝內
是不是還有我的存在
永遠攏底等
有時陣嘛會不甘願
想講要作伙飛
去一個心中美麗的所在
所有的一切
攏總尬你放作夥
希望你會當了解

今阿日月娘那這呢光
照著阮歸暝攏未凍睏
親像魚死底花園

你甘知阮對你的思念
希望你有同款的夢
咱兩人做陣返來那一天
互相依偎的情愛

底你的心肝內
是不是還有我的存在
永遠攏底等
有時陣嘛會不甘願
想講要作伙飛
去一個心中美麗的所在
所有的一切
攏總尬你放作夥
希望你會當了解

我不管多少時間
多少目屎多少失望來忍耐
我不管你當時會返來
其實我嘛不知影為怎樣為怎樣憨憨等待
你
是我唯一的愛......

底你的心肝內
是不是還有我的存在
永遠攏底等
有時陣嘛會不甘願
想講要作伙飛
去一個心中美麗的所在
所有的一切
攏總尬你放作夥
希望你會當了解
為著你我一定等
_____________________________________

這是一個愛情等待者的自我獨白，他無悔於等待，守護著愛。他希望像鳥一般比翼雙飛，卻成為了失去水的魚。

I'm feeling some strange emotions today, emotions that I haven't felt in a long long time.

Sometimes, we human beings think and analyse stuff too much. It gets exhausting and honestly, just kills brain cells. Which is why I like things straight forward and simple. Maybe some would view it as reckless, tactless even dangerous, but I find it refreshing. I think we are stronger than we think. We aren't made of porcelain. So go ahead, be direct, tell them the truth, because they are strong enough to handle it.

To those out there who are waiting for Mister or Miss Right, this beautiful song if for you. The fact that it is in Hokkien makes it so much more sophisticated.

Peace and love.

Of intubations, leopards and tigers.

2010-02-10T23:30:00.004+08:00

I think its really strange to transition from intubating and doing CPR on a couple of collapsed patients, to making your way home the next moment to change before leaving for the Night Safari to do my part for the department in helping to entertain a distinguished foreign guest. Such is the nature of life in the emergency department. (And shift work!)

I haven't had much time to really get a feel of what its like to be working in the Emergency Department because I've only just started elective there on Monday, and so far the supervisor I'm supposed to be following is on leave and my replacement supervisor is on leave every other day, but yeah, I've learnt that in Emergency Medicine, you really can't predict what's going to happen next. There are quiet night calls, and there are extremely hellish ones. There are days were everything goes according to plan and there are nights that hell will rain blood and tears all over you. Take today for example: in the span of the 2 hours where I was on the shop floor, there were a total of 4 standbys one after another(2 of them were collapses, 1 STEMI and 1 AMS), another patient who suddenly deteriorated while making her way to the CT scan and a resuscitation bay that was jammed packed with people rushing to create a sense of order among the chaos. Today also marks the first time I had ever heard the anguish screams of relatives resonating through the air when they are first told the words that every family dreads to hear from the mouth of a doctor: 'I'm sorry, but we've done our best.' I had only thought that you'll hear or see such scenes in the movies, but today I realized that it happens in real life as well. And the message really hit home because the patient in question was one of two patients that I had intubated and performed CPR on. You realize that this is life. There's always going to be death. Such is the nature of Medicine.

And of course, the next moment, I was on my way home because I was "volunteered" by my replacement supervisor to accompany another registrar and a foreign dignitary to the Night Safari, and thus ended my shift 5 hours before I was due to go. (I highly suspect that its all his ploy to get rid of me!). It was a surreal experience, having to just drop all the drama and horror seen in the last 45 mins or so and just walk out of the department doors having to feel excited and happy about going to the Night Safari, but I was strangely up to it. It just felt surreal and a bit weird, but the sadness isn't there anymore. Either I've become too jaded and used to death, or I've just master the art of letting go.

But anyway, that's not my point. I was asking the registrar involved why she had to play tour guide as well and she gave me the 'Duh, just like you, I got arrowed lah' look. I guess being arrowed to do stuff totally unrelated to the practice of medicine, is probably something that all junior specialist doctors have to do. Being arrowed to do sai-gang: probably a constant here in Singapore really, regardless of where you actually work in. But yeah, it was interesting. Entertaining foreign guests can be amusing. Its all smiles and cordial speech. It gets quite tiring as well, but it was something different compared to I don't know, setting an IV line or Toilet and Suturing. But such is the wonder of the shift system - you have time to do something totally unrelated to medicine everyday, which can be a perfect break sometimes.

I wonder what other surprises lie in wait in the TTSH A&E department. I can hardly wait. =)

when dreaming is better than reality

2010-01-15T21:47:00.005+08:00

"There are many dangers on Pandora, and one of the subtlest is that you may come to love it too much." - Dr. Augustine Grace from 'Avatar'

James Cameron's 'Avatar' is probably going to be one of the best movies I've ever watched in my whole darn life. I had heard and read so much about this movie before going to watch it that I was initially worried that I would be disappointed by all the hype it had generated. Well, it certainly didn't disappoint! To quote Jake Sully, it was simply "Outstanding!"

There are so many reasons why 'Avatar' was such a fantastic movie. First of all the cast was fantastic, especially those acting as the Na'vi. I think Sam Worthington acted very well in this movie and there's no doubt that he is in for super stardom. This film would catapult him to the echelons of Hollywood and I think we have just witnessed the rise of a new action superstar. His portrayal of Jake Sully made the hero very likeable, and you feel for him when he faces so many life changing experiences in the movie. Zoe Saldana's portrayal of Neytiri, the Na'vi princess was also fantastic - her flashes of pure joy and anger, her snares, her posture was so convincing that she brought a potentially difficult character to life. Stephen Lang plays Miles Quaritch, the crazy warmongering Colonel with such a single minded determination that its hard not to want him dead, chewed and torn into a million fragments by a dozen Banshees and ultimately passed out into a sea of excrement. Other notable performances by Sigourney Weaver as scientist-mentor Dr Augustine Grace and Michelle Rodriguez as Helicopter pilot Truddy also add solid performances to the fantastic ensemble cast.

Apart from the cast, I was also simply awestruck at the amazing detail and depth James Cameron had invested within this movie to create a universe as realistic as Pandora. The technological achievement is just astounding, the level of creativity simply amazing. Watching the actors performances being fully translated onto the computer generated Na'vi was just an amazing feat of technology that was just awe-inspiring. Every motion was so fluid, every emotion so brilliantly captured that you really don't think that its computer generated at all. And the cinematography, the landscapes were just AWESOME. Seeing those scenes of Jake and Neytiri flying through the amazing backdrop of floating mountains and waterfalls was like poetry in motion. Fantastic!

But for all the technical breakthroughs that the film has managed to attain, I would think that the strongest draw for me is the epic tale that it so seamlessly puts together.

'Avatar' has a relatively simple plot. It is no 'Sherlock Holmes' (another film I managed to catch this week that's quite good, but not as fantastic as Avatar!) in terms of its plot twists and convolutions. It has a very predictable plot filled with characters that have stereotypical personalities and serve their typical functions in such a story. Some would even label it as 'Pocahontas in Space'. But despite its simple plot, I found the movie strangely touching and inspiring; in the hands of a lesser director, such a run of the mill, almost cliche story would appear ridiculous, but in the hands of a master like James Cameron, it became an epic tale with a heart.

The story has so many elements to it, so many layers of depth that it really is a masterpiece. On the surface, its the usual tale of Nature vs Machine: of the importance of respecting our natural world, of protecting the balance of nature and life, of the triumph of mother nature over the corrupted, polluted world of mankind - themes all too familiar to us, the generation that has to deal with the very serious notion of global warming and a dying planet. But dissect it further and you'll realize that its also a story of one man's own desire to free himself from the hopelessness and dredges of a life that no longer has any meaning to him.

Here you have Jake Sully, a paraplegic ex-marine with nothing to look forward to with regards to a life on earth, who decides to embark on this project for a fresh start in another planet: and look what at what he gains! A whole new life, one ultimately so much more beautiful and exhilarating that the life back on earth, trapped in a wheel chair; a life that he truly comes to love. Its a story of rediscovering oneself and rebirth, and the scene where Jake Sully first uses his Avatar body and discovers he can walk again has to be one of the most touching scenes in the movie ever - you can almost feel his joy on being able to walk, run, jump, feel with his feet again! It was amazing.

I think everyone out there hopes to have a means of escaping from reality and one of the reasons why 'Avatar' is proving to be so popular is the fact that it provides some sort of escapism that we so dearly desire. Wouldn't it be perfect if we could just plug our consciousness into a mainframe and live our lives in an alternate body in another beautiful universe? Its a twist on the concept first introduced in the Matrix, but in that case, the universe we end up getting plugged in is a form of slavery. Pandora however, is the opposite - it represents a beautiful world of freedom and infinite possibilities, one in which you can fly atop great ferocious flying beasts, prance through beautiful bio luminescent forests or witness stunningly beautiful waterfalls and floating mountains. To be able to escape to such a world, even if its just for 160 mins, is just awesome. I would be willing to watch it another time just to recapture that magic all over again!

"Everything is backwards now, like out there is the true world and in here is the dream." - Jake Sully from 'Avatar'
I love this quote from the movie. Its true isn't it? Sometimes, you enjoy the world you are in while dreaming, so much so that its a pain to return to reality. And the boundary between reality and dream scape is blurred indefinitely. But ultimately, dreams are just dreams, and we can't live in them for eternity. We aren't as lucky as Jake Sully who was able to transfer his soul from a horrible dream into a Utopian reality. Perhaps one day, we will be able to relive our lives by plugging our consciousness into a new body, but before that day arrives, we have to make do with living in our current realities and re-watching Avatar and its sequels to come, because that's as close to utopia that we can get.

amazing tunes in black and white

2009-12-21T22:21:00.003+08:00

My recent late night obsession has been to camp up til the wee hours of the night searching for black and white videos of The Beatles performing their MANY wonderful songs.

Honestly, I've never been that obsessed with The Beatles. I mean, I've obviously known about them, because HEY, they are the BEATLES! They're the greatest band ever to have walked on the surface of this planet, and their music, be it the incredibly catchy "mop-top" tunes of their early days or the amazingly eclectic bizarre psychedelic signatures that are to characterize their later works, is just phenomenally good. Everyone grew up listening to a few songs that would haven been composed by the Beatles. Even in the 21st century, their music is still incredibly addictive.

The start of my latest obsessive behavior occurred when I was shopping for CDs at HMV last week. I happened to notice that there was a whole shelf dedicated to the Beatles. Apparently their albums have just been re-mastered and re-released to a whole new generation of music lovers. I was sorely tempted to buy all their albums at one shot - but to do so meant that I would have to part with over 200 dollars just to have the whole damn collection. I wasn't willing to spend that much money at one go, so I left without even purchasing a single Beatles album.

But I wasn't ready to let it be! That very night, I went home and logged onto the internet, and found thousands of videos on Youtube concerning the Beatles. I randomly clicked on the link to what looked like the oldest, most antiquated video that I could find. It turned out to be a video of them performing 'Twist And Shout'. That was followed by another video of 'I Want To Hold Your Hand', and then one of 'Eleanor Rigby' and before I knew it, I was on the path to obsession. So for the past few nights, I've been watching videos of the Fab Four performing countless songs. Heck, I've even started watching the 9-episode Beatles Anthology documentary series on Youtube. So much for starting work on Pathology!

That said, I must say that its quite understandable why the Beatles became the legend that they were. I think it goes beyond their singing or their musical talents. Its because the four of them had charisma and character. The thing that struck me most while watching the videos of them perform (and some occasional videos of them doing absolutely nonsensical stuff) was that they were quite hilarious and amusing to watch! They had an infectious quality to them, especially when they were younger. Here's a video of them performing one of their greatest hits, "I Want to Hold Your Hand":

Paul McCartney especially, looked liked some hyperactive, highly enthusiastic schoolboy kid who can't wait to scream into his microphone! They looked so different when they were young! So fresh! So adorably exuberant! John Lennon looked so dapper before he started wearing those trademark spectacles and letting his hair grow long. Ringo Starr looked liked some hilariously dopey person who just can't wait to hit his drum. George Harrison's my favourite Beatle: he reminds me of a goody two shoes kind of boy who desperately wants to do something naughty! Haha

I wished I were around when they actually were starting out though! Its one thing to watch old black and white videos of them, but I think it would have been so much cooler to really see them in the flesh when they were truly at the zenith of their careers!

当我们同在一起

2009-12-17T22:17:00.002+08:00

I think this drama is a hundred times better than "Little Nonya". Its a pity it doesn't seem to be getting as much of a hype as the former though.

I like the way it has given us a glimpse into the life of teenagers living through the 60s. Its like a really good representation of our parents' own lives, how they grew up and stuff. I asked my mum if she actually encountered some of the problems and stuff mentioned in the drama, and she was like "Oh my god, they really put that in? I used to do that/see that/play that all the time!" Its amazing really. Though we are a relatively young nation, Singapore does have an amazingly rich pool of culture and history that we can tap into, and I think we really should create more shows and stories on life then - all the other kind of contemporary dramas that Mediacorp produces are honestly quite ridiculous, far fetched and stupid (for example, the current drama airing at the 7 O'clock time slot).

Oh and unlike "The Little Nonya", "Together" is actually rather light-hearted! Its seriously damn funny! Its comedic, but at the same time, it never fails to have a heart. If there's one thing I hated about "The Little Nonya", its the way it progressed into such an over-the-top tragic melodrama. "Together" managed to steer away from being too tragic, and manages to have this right balance of light-hearted downright hilarious scenes that managed to capture the simplicity of life in the 1960s, with dramatic scenes that explore the emotional turmoils of life then. I never knew that all those young actors and actresses from Mediacorp actually could pull off comedy with such a comic timing! Quite impressive I must say.

In general, I think I'm drawn more towards period dramas. I like watching shows about people living in a different time. I think I've grown so tired of living in today's modern world that I kind of look forward to a form of escapism away from the hustle and bustle of modernity. Life in the 60s looks so inviting, I hope to throw away everything and just go back to the days of playing Goh-Li, Chap Jee Kee and Tikam. Haha

我沒有說謊 ;)

2009-11-22T15:36:00.002+08:00

Its November, and I realised that the last entry here was dated 15th of October. Its been more than a month since I've left an entry here! Time really flies when you are preoccupied with work. Haha.

Its been five weeks since I last visited my blog. In these five weeks, I've started on my excruciating path down Obstetrics and Gynaecology, which really isn't a breeze to go through at all. In the past five weeks, I've delivered babies, I've seen (and examined) the nether regions of many women, I've touched countless pregnant bellies and I've come to reinforce my conclusion that O and G is definitely not my cup of tea. Its not as disgusting as I had envisioned it be to, and truth be told, its definitely easier than paediatrics, but honestly you have to really enjoy interacting and dealing with hormonal, angry and grumpy women to love O and G. Its definitely a job for women. Who better to deal with women than women themselves?

I haven't been doing much in the past few weeks except work work work. There was playhouse in which I was glad that I could at least help out a bit in the production. There were the occasional meetings with family and friends. And then there was the period of severe depression and exhaustion that lasted for 5 days or so. But I'm glad that the depression is over (the exhaustion, unfortunately, is never ever going to go away!) and I think I shouldn't have a problem surviving the last 3 weeks before the end of my most feared posting.

Anyway, I was studying when this random thought just floated into my brain: people lie all the time, whether or not they actually meant for these lies to hurt is another matter altogether. I think alot of people lie to people that they are close to: be it girlfriends/boyfriends, spouses, family, friends, mistresses/lover etc. Very often, we don't lie to those that we aren't close to at all. We couldn't care less if they heard the painful truth, so we just give them a dose of toxic reality and let them deal with the consequences. But when it comes to someone who you genuinely like, you can help but lie - whether its preferring to avoid letting them know the truth, whether its acting as if nothing bad ever happened and just letting them continue to live on with their lives, we prefer to avoid dumping the ugly truth on them. We do so because we supposedly care about their feelings and emotions, to 'protect' them, but sometimes, such actions would result in more harm than good.

The truth is an extremely fickle and dangerous thing. I don't really like to be faced with it, but I think we are unfortunately forced to deal with it everyday. I feel like I'm forced to cope with it be telling more lies which sends everything into a conundrum of repetitive causality and effect. I guess lying is a coping mechanism, to hide from the realities of the world - some people live in fantasies, some people live in lies.

It just so happens that Yoga 林宥嘉's new album has this fantastic new song called "說謊"!

"我沒有說謊我何必說謊
愛一個人沒愛到難道就會怎麼樣
別說我說謊人生已經如此的艱難
有些事情就不要拆穿"
I think this stanza is appropriately apt. At the end of the day, I guess its better to live with the lies and avoid uncovering them - some things are better left uncovered. :)

The problem with being idle

2009-10-15T17:17:00.002+08:00

This week's gonna be my last ever week of being idle in a very long time. Haha. With the end of my short postings just around the corner, I feel a slight tinge of sadness that my life's going to be replaced by the madness that is O&G. But truth be told, a part of me is actually happy that such idle days are almost over. I honestly feel that having absolutely nothing to study for is much much worse than having tonnes of work to do. The days of short postings were just like the former - very often, there just wasn't any impetus to read or to learn stuff. They were just days of endless waiting and loafing about - too much loafing in fact! I think my brain has officially undergone liquefactive necrosis and has turned into jello.

Not that I did not enjoy my days in the various short postings. I had fun in most, if not all of them. Still, I feel like I've come out of these short postings without truly accomplishing anything, like I've just woken up from an incredibly long coma and is currently struggling to shake off the remnants of stupor. I need some excitement to refresh my life man. These 2 months of slacking has really taken a toil on whatever edge I once had.

Then again, once O&G gets underway, I'll probably look back at this entry and wonder 'WHAT THE HELL WAS I COMPLAINING ABOUT?!?!' But yeah, that's another issue for me to face another day. As of now, I need to get out of this slump. TOO MUCH COMPUTER GAMES. ARGH.

500 days of Summer

2009-10-08T23:49:00.003+08:00

This is NOT your average love story. Its a story that focuses on the deconstruction of a relationship.

I absolutely loved it, because its quirky, non-conventional and bittersweet. It has amazingly likeable leads who you can't help but root for. Joseph Gordon-Levitt's acting is the highlight of this film - his subtle portrayal of a sensitive man who is vulnerable both in and out of love was just excellent! I want to say more, but my mind's totally fried from long hours of sleep deprivation. Dude, this film just rocks!

After watching the film, I can't help but feel a sense of gratification. Love, is just a fantasy. A fantasy that forces us to have amazingly high expectations of what we hope Love will be, but then the brutality of reality will always make us realise how silly our thoughts were. As the titular character in the film, 'Summer' so coolly explains - 'Life happened. And Love was gone.'

This film is for all the self professed nerds out there who have problems finding or understanding that tricky little concept that we call 'Love'. I wanted to watch it because I felt that I might be able to identify with the film's lead. I came out of it feeling as if I've lived through all my failed attempts at contemplating 'Love' all over again. Such is the nature of it all - we males of the new-age-geeky-nerdy-emo-i'm-so-sensitive-and-sweet generation have such an amazingly stupid way of destroying our own relationships because we just read too much into the silliest of things. Its absurd really, but its true. The film captures nothing but the truth.

The truth is, as much as I would love to deny it - I'm still a geeky, nerdy, socially awkward guy living in today's ultra-fast paced modern society, and I totally dread dipping my toes in the ocean of modern day romances. God Save Me.

Summer/Fever

2009-09-21T12:58:00.002+08:00

Sodagreen's "夏/狂热" album is the second album that they have released this year. The continuation of their "Vivaldi Four Seasons" project, it comes just five months after the release of their previous album "春·日光". I loved "春·日光" for its folksy, light-hearted, cheerful feel, which to me, really epitomized the true spirit of Spring. But I got to say that I'm loving the second album even more!

"夏/狂热" as a whole, when compared to "春·日光", is an album that's very different in its overall presentation and feel. "夏/狂热" is definitely devoid of the easy-going charm of the previous album, that feeling of relaxed, light-heartedness is now replaced by slightly more melancholic, infinitely more rockish themes. The change in lyrical style is also very very telling: this album has lyrics that are darker, more emotional, more soulful - in fact, the lyrics are often very dark, bleak, pessimistic even. A total 180 degree reversal from the optimism and hopefulness found in the previous album.

"夏/狂热" is a Mandarin album that was recorded in London, because the band had a goal in mind to fashion this album into something that captured the essence of good old fashion British Rock. I think they have succeeded in achieving that: the tunes sound like stuff that could come out of many fantastic British bands, like Coldplay, Travis, Oasis, Franz Ferdinand, Keane etc. And I love British Rock, so this album is just a treat to my ears. The arrangements inspire me! Fantastic!

I particularly enjoyed tracks like "他夏了夏天" which to me, captured the very essence of Summer: energetic, bustling with life and activity but at the same time, there's a degree of laziness and dreariness attached to it. Its a song that has an infectious mid tempo tune, and its arrangement is something that I love alot.

"包围" has a very very long introduction, and surprise surprise, its actually the first song whose tune was composed by the Sodagreen as a band. It reminds me alot of 'Life In Technicolour' by Coldplay, not because it has a similar tune or anything, but the way the different instruments come in in progression: it creates an ascension of tunes that gives this song an extremely complex and layered feel to it. Fantastic!

"御花园" and "彼得与狼" are two songs that feel like they were meant to be brothers or something. They are typical rock tunes that just inspire you to be High and to go into a frenzy. Perfect for 'Live' concerts!

"无眠" has to be the SURPRISE of the album. This is a slow emtional tune composed by Drummer 小威 with lyrics by Lead Vocalist 青峰. This special thing about this song is that its lyrics are actually in Hokkien - which in my opinion is always a risky thing because it runs the risk of turning the song into something that's going to be extremely beng-ish. But this song turned out to be so so so so so beautiful, the emotion it evokes is just unbelievable. I love this song the most. Definitely a sleeper hit in the making.

"狂热" is the first single off the album. Its a full out rock song, and probably the best song to capture the 狂热 aspect of this album. I like the way this song makes me sway and bob my head with the tune. Very cathartic to sing along and just shake your stresses and worries away!

"近未来" - the last track of the album, and I think the longest. Its quite different from the other tracks in the sense that its more hesitant, even reserved and conservative in its attempt to bring across its message. This is a reflective piece, and would serve as a perfect song to highlight the transition from Summer to Autumn (just like how "融雪之前" from the previous album served as a prefect transition from Winter to Spring!). Nice to end with a song that feels different from the rest of the other tracks!

These are just some of the tracks that I enjoyed more. That doesn't mean that the other tracks weren't good; all the tracks here are solid. However, the other tracks don't stand out as much as these few that I particularly liked and enjoyed. All in all, this is a fantastic album, which is amazing because Sodagreen has always been so consistent in producing not just amazing singles, but amazing albums that should be listened as a single entity. That's the beauty of their music really - one has to listen to the album in its continuity to fully appreciate the true message that they are trying to bring across to the listener. If the first two albums of 'Project Vivaldi' are already so deliciously good, I can hardly wait for what surprises the next two albums would bring next year!

MAF 2009

2009-09-20T23:08:00.003+08:00

I had a great time at HwaChong's MAF last night! Every year I say the same thing about MAF, how great it is to go back to HwaChong to soak in the atmosphere of being back home again, of being able to hang out with my JC classmates and friends, to laze around the beloved class bench, to do all the lame and incredibly stupid things we used to do. But the thing is, I never get tired reflecting on how wonderful MAF is. I think MAF is what makes HwaChong great. That sense of family and belonging that it manages to generate - no other institution comes up with something close to it.

I did do something different though - I actually stayed to dance in the mass dance session, which is something I never did do in the last 4 years of MAF. I dunno, something got me extremely high last night. I suspect its the fact that I was listening to Sodagreen's 'Summer/Fever' album prior to going for MAF, but that's going to be another story for another time. But yeah, I actually danced in the mass dance session! Its a miracle I didn't drop dead, but I did step on ALOT of people's toes with my totally unco-ordinated foot work and slap ALOT of people with my flailing arms! Totally worth it! =P

Its really nice to go back to HwaChong every year. Honestly, I do feel like I feel more for HwaChong then say, MedFac or NUS. Its a special feeling that I would always look forward experiencing during that special time of the year! I LOVE MAF!

I'll search for the Orange Moon that lit up our love on the Ocean

2009-09-13T00:51:00.003+08:00

Orange Moon - Khalil Fong

There we sat among the thousand,
fools just like us, but not so in love like us.
There we spoke of our love feelings,
and dreams were born like that, and we hope for love like that.
Now your dreams have changed and were far apart.
I don't know when or where to start,
leading you from my mind.
I want to stand with you again.
I hope to find you here again
in the eternal sunshine.

*I'll search for the orange moon that lit up our love on the ocean
while I hold your hand.
Now watch all the waves from the stones
where we gazed to the golden sun.
If I see the horizon,
glow just the same as it did when we stood on the hill.
Ill make the arrangements, just wait on that corner for me.
If you drop me a line, Ill be sure to make these arrangements.

Lay your head upon my shoulder,
Ill sing a tune or three sweet melodies for thee.
Softly speak, to say 我愛你,
why do you leave,
my heart is at your feet.
Well, I like to share three words again,
Parts of these words with you again if you think its possible.
And maybe I can pull you close
and whisper in your ear again
that I want you in my life forever.

*I'll search for the orange moon that lit up our love on the ocean
while I hold your hands.
Now watch all the waves from the stones
where we gazed to the golden sun.
If I see the horizon,
glow just the same as it did when we stood on the hill.
Ill make the arrangements,
just wait on that corner for me.

You are like the summer rain that cools me, that sooths me.
You are the person that I pray for everyday.
Maybe well sit on those stairs once again,
maybe we wont turn down have to pretend,
you will be here in my imaginings, fade imaginings.

*I'll search for the orange moon that lit up our love on the ocean
while I hold your hands.
Now watch all the waves from the stones
where we gazed to the golden sun.
If I see the horizon,
glow just the same as it did when we stood on the hill.
I'll make the arrangements, just wait on that corner for me.
If you drop me a line, Ill be sure to make these arrangements.
__________________________________

This is a hidden track from Khalil Fong's Orange Moon album. It doesn't have a real title per say, but I guess Orange Moon's a perfect one, given that that's the album's title and that the term appears quite often throughout the song. Apparently, its the original English demo of a song that was later sung by Eason Chan (its Mandarin version's called 倒带人生). I've heard both versions, and I must say Khalil's original version is much nicer. Its just the vibe of the song. The tune's addictively simple and carefree, the kind that's hard to come by these days. The lyrics are also simple, but romantic. Its like poetry really. I wish I could write lyrics of such quality and caliber, but any attempts by me are usually quite laughable. Haha. I mean, if they were any good, I would have publish them on this blog already. But oh well, not everyone has what it takes to be an amazing lyricist, and I guess I'm not one of those born geniuses. :)

I've been busy lately. Not with work but with meeting ups and stuff. I like it really. This week's been busy, but immensely satisfying. I'm happy. Like really genuinely happy, and its because I've been doing nothing fantastic but to live a mind-numbing ordinary life - a life that consist of work, catching up with friends and spending time with family. I think we really do have to start paying attention to and to start learning how to appreciate the simple things in life - because like lyrics, the more simple it is, the more beautiful it becomes. Life doesn't have to be a drama-mama fairy tale, it can be just a simple uneventful story and it'll still be something that can be immensely wonderful.

So just treasure it. And remember to look for the Orange Moon that lit up our love in the horizon. :)

PHS 2009

2009-08-30T21:15:00.000+08:00

Whoever said that Public Health Screening (PHS) was losing purpose should go eat some barbituates and die of asphyxiation. If anything, there's still tonnes of purpose in organizing this annual event.

First of all, I wanna say that this year's PHS was quite well organized. I must say the M3s and M2s did quite a marvelous job in putting it together. And the turnout of volunteers was just AMAZING. So many M1s and M2s turned up! It was a sight that managed to touch the dried up heart of mine. Haha.

I think this new batch of M1s are amazingly enthusiastic. Okay... maybe its still too early to see if they can keep the enthusiasm going (admittedly, we probably felt the same way when we first started medical school, but look at how 4 years of hard work managed to change us into a bunch of jaded, cynical old farts who complain incessantly!) but in general, their bright-eyed enthusiasm was really quite a sight to behold. And they are so fresh! Every single thing amazes them! Let them take blood pressure and they squeal in delight! Let them take blood glucose/cholesterol and they squeal in delight! Let them talk to patient and they squeal in delight! Let them take height and weight and they ALSO squeal in delight! Damn amusing. I think that such an event is a perfect introduction to world of medicine though: I mean, at the end of the day, Medicine is a kind of service. Being in Medicine means that we are rendering a service to the public, and by giving these enthusiastic M1s a chance to serve the public, to see how its done, is just a perfect way to orientate themselves to this fact. That alone is good enough a reason to keep organizing this event every single year!

That said, the real reason why I find PHS so meaningful is that it really gives us a chance to reach out to people. Just two days spent in PHS has rekindled my passion for Medicine. Very often, in the hustle and bustle and intense stress of everyday clinical work, we often forget the reason why we started taking up Medicine in the first place. And being there at PHS, talking with members of the public, joking with them, sympathizing with them, listening to them, I'm reminded once again of the reason why I'M in Medicine: its because I wanted to help these people. No matter how rude and grumpy they are, no matter how ridiculous and absurd their demands may be, I wanted to help people. And for a moment, I completely lost sight of that. But this weekend has brought it all back, and now I feel like I'm back on the right track again!

PHS is not about scoring brownie points for volunteering or about getting free gifts (or even ridiculous stylish Polo-tees). Its about exhibiting the passion, the heart and the altruism that resides in all of us. And that is the true purpose of PHS.

狂热

2009-08-28T00:05:00.002+08:00

<<狂热>> 词：吴青峰曲：史俊威
雷响得放肆死去活来坚持抛空了理智
疯狂或正直来自同个本质有什么意思
在这个急于立碑的城市
谁比谁更无耻干我屁事

任凭时光你是多狠我要我的选择为了快乐抗争
任凭谁说我有多蠢不让你的新闻毁了我的单纯
长大后的我们狡猾地修改过程
童年故事汗湿的脏手心抓着狂热

冷血的怪手种起大厦高楼森林被扛走
土地的脉搏戴上手铐大锁日开始不落
却忘了所有新都来自旧
只在乎今天有多少回扣

我知道自己的模样在这个世界上拥有可贵力量
我保护自己的地方不让别人弄脏才能勇敢疯狂
小时候我们的天真在心里长大
成年故事再多挑战也不害怕

狂热自己的模样....
就算偶尔受伤打直腰杆坚强
因为受过了伤自由才有光
__________________________

Part 2 of Sodagreen's 4 seasons project is scheduled to be released in Taiwan on the 11th of Sept! Woohoo!

Strawberry Swing

2009-08-26T23:25:00.001+08:00

Its no secret that Coldplay is one of my favourite bands.
And yes, while I love their music, I also love their music videos alot!
Their latest video of the single 'Strawberry Swing' is just another example of how music videos can be more than just divas lip-syncing and gyrating along with a bunch of random people; it's simply evidence that music videos can also be works of art.

Fantastic video. Wonder how long they took to even film it!

Love is...

2009-08-20T19:51:00.000+08:00

Just something out of Friends:

Love is sweet as summer showers
Love is wondrous work of art
But your love, Oh your love, your love
Is like a giant pigeon
Crapping on my heart

Phoebe is hilarious! Haha

可是我有时候宁愿选择留恋不放手等到风景都看透也许你会陪我看细水长流

2009-08-12T17:05:00.002+08:00

紅豆
还没好好的感受
雪花绽放的气候
我们一起颤抖
会更明白什么是温柔
还没跟你牵著手
走过荒芜的沙丘
可能从此以后学会珍惜
天长和地久

有时候有时候
我会相信一切有尽头
相聚离开都有时候
没有什么会永垂不朽
可是我有时候
宁愿选择留恋不放手
等到风景都看透
也许你会陪我看细水长流

还没为你把红豆
熬成缠绵的伤口
然后一起分享
会更明白相思的哀愁
还没好好的感受
醒著亲吻的温柔
可能在我左右
你才追求孤独的自由

有时候有时候
我会相信一切有尽头
相聚离开都有时候
没有什么会永垂不朽
可是我有时候
宁愿选择留恋不放手
等到风景都看透
也许你会陪我看细水长流
_____________________________

又一首经典歌曲被翻唱！太好听了！
非常凄凉，非常幽美, 词又超棒的!
最喜欢 "可是我有时候宁愿选择留恋不放手等到风景都看透也许你会陪我看细水长流" 这句歌词... 天啊! 这不就是我的生活写造吗?!?!

復刻回憶

2009-08-10T23:39:00.002+08:00

复刻回憶 - 薛凱琪, 方大同
你还好吗好久不见
又来这里这个老店
後来的你喜欢了谁
我们聊聊天
现在的你一样美丽
至於爱情是个回忆
她不爱我他离开你
爱会来就会去

在不同的城市努力
偶尔也会想想你
这样的我那样的你
要很久才相聚

我们都没说那遥远的曾经
我们也没提故事的原因
青春的复刻回忆像一片云
没法子抓在手里
我们的眼泪在复习着过去
我们的微笑是彼此的氧气
复刻的回忆是封挂号信
多远都可以找到你

窗外的树爱哭的风
烦恼的我聪明的你
爱是什麽什麽人懂
所以别难过
心还痛吗请忘了吧
所谓幸福是个童话
後来的我一切随意
所以没关系

在不同的城市努力
偶尔也会想想你
这样的我那样的你
要很久才相聚
我们都没说那遥远的曾经
我们也没提故事的原因
青春的复刻回忆像一片云
没法子抓在手里
我们的眼泪在复习着过去
我们的微笑是彼此的氧气
复刻的回忆是封挂号信
多远都可以找到你

午後的闷热的窗外的一场大雨
让我们看见了以前的自己
把时光倒转回那一季
那年的梦他乡的你
____________________________________

Thanks to today's Kbox session with XC, I'm currently hooked on this song. Argh its such a nice song, but its very hard to catch the harmonization. But its such a captivating song. I think this sort of song needs practice to get the whole harmonization right - is the guy supposed to be high or low? Is the girl supposed to be high throughout? Complicating. And everything's so subtle. Needs countless repeated listening to really pick out the necessary changes in the tune and all. A challenge, but if we can master it, I think it'll be perfect!

Oh and Khalil Fong is amazing. I'm going to spam his albums! ROAR!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OH MY GOD. And they actually sang it 'Live' right here:

WOW. Sublime magic. These two have chemistry man. I know that they are great friends in real life, both being from Hong Kong at all. How come they aren't together arh? They are perfect man. They should fall in love and get married and have a choir of children! ARGH!

And its true: we sing best in the shower. "因为没有穿衣服!" HAHAHAHAHA! Hilarious!

let's take a little trip back in time....

2009-08-09T23:59:00.004+08:00

This entry's a little bit late, but here's my little National Day tribute to Singapore.

I LOVE National Day. No secret to that. Old friends would know that I get very high especially when it comes to National Day. Its my favourite holiday, apart from Chinese New Year and Christmas! And one reason why I love National Day so much is because of the wealth of patriotic songs that keep popping by every year. So this year, I decided to piece together a youtube timeline of all the national day songs since 1998, the year where national day songs first became an annual event. So here goes!

1998 - Home by Kit Chan
The song that started it all, and probably the very best. Kit Chan and Dick Lee gave us an instant classic, one that never seizes to tug the heart strings of every Singaporean. Every time I hear the familiar tune, I feel a sense of warmth that no other song can bring. Great tune, great lyrics, I love it. =)

1999 - Together by Evelyn Tan and Dreamz FM
I remember this was the year I first watch the Parade 'Live' on the actual day itself! And that performance left a great impression on me, because the atmosphere was just addictive. From that year on, I would always try to get my hands on tickets. Haha. I liked this song, and though it wasn't as popular as Home, but it was definitely one of the better NDP songs! Listening to it invokes lots of memories.

2000 - Shine On Me by Jai and Mavis Hee
Oh this song will always hold a special place in my heart, because this was the theme song of the parade in which I performed in. I remember we were SO stoked about this song, it had a catchy tune and when we sang in life, the atmosphere was just electrifying! Almost as electrifying as when the national anthem was sung! Sigh.

2001 - Where I Belong by Tanya Chua
When I first heard it, I remember thinking that the lyrics to this song were actually quite retarded. Haha. I still think so, but nowadays, I think its a cute kind of retarded. It has an amazingly simple and catchy melody though! I watched the parade on National Day as well, I remember that it wasn't as spectacular as the previous year's but yeah, Tanya was great!

2002 - We Will Get There by Stefanie Sun
Sigh. A personal favourite of mine. This was the song that I was hoping to hear since I fell in love with Stefanie Sun. It was even featured in Stefanie's 5th studio Album, 'Leave' as well! Haha. I loved it, because it was different from the songs of previous NDP. This had a more contemporary and rock/rougher feel to it. And of course, it was sung by Stefanie Sun! Woo-hoo! I particularly loved the MV of this song though, don't really know why. Maybe its the sight of Stef standing atop the then newly launched Esplanade! Haha! Also, this marked the last time I actually watched the Parade 'Live' on the actual day itself!

2003 - One United People by Stefanie Sun
YUP! She sand the NDP song two years in a row! I remember that Stef performed this song while standing atop this super duper tall pillar, it was just amazing! Haha. I don't really have much to say about this song, if Stefanie didn't sing it, I probably wouldn't remember it as fondly though. Haha, still its much nicer than many of the other songs that came out later. Haha

2004 - Home by Young Voices Choir & JJ Lin
'Home' was once again the NDP song of 2004, but this time round, there were two different versions of it. A drama-mama version sung by a Young Voices Choir and a hip-hop Mandarin version sung by JJ Lin. This video's that of the version sung by the choir! I didn't particularly like these two new remixes of the old classic. I still love Kit Chan's rendition of 'Home' and I personally think no other singer can ever replace her. Sigh. But still, 'Home' is 'Home'. Its such a nice song. Amazing.

2005 - Reach Out For the Skies by Rui En & Taufik Batisah
HAHA, this is the year where the song had a silly dance to accompany it. HAHA. I remember my cousins dancing to it when it was being sung at the parade. I never really remembered or took notice of the lyrics, though the line 'Let's reach out for the skies, with wings we soar up high!' is admittedly quite addictive. That's about the only line I could remember from the song though. Haha, still kudos to it for being the first NDP song to incorporate a fun dance.

2006 - My Island Home by Kaira Gong
Oh I actually like this particular song! I felt it was reminiscent of 'Home', maybe a less touching version, but it definitely is a song that invokes loads of bravado and gusto, emotions that are perfect for a NDP song. Its a pity that this particular song never got popular. Definitely one of the more underrated NDP songs out there.

2007 - There's No Place I'd Rather Be by Kit Chan & Will You by Janani Sridhar, Asha Edmund, Emma Yong, Lily Anna Rahmat, Jai Wahab, Shabir Mohammaed, Sebastian Tan and Gani Karim
This was the year where there were actually 2 different theme songs. I remember the song sung by Kit Chan was subject to alot of criticism because some people thought the lyrics were questionable. Haha The other song will always be remembered as the one with SUPER DRAMA MV. Haha damn hilarious.

2008 - Shine For Singapore by Hady Mirza & Joi Chua
I think this was the most forgettable of ALL the NDP songs. I don't really have much of an impression of this particular song. Yup, didn't really like it. In fact NDP 2008 was probably one of the most unmemorable ones ever. Haha.

2009 - What Do You See by Electrico
And of course... this year's song. For my comments on it, read my entry dated 21st July. Haha

Well. I love my National Day songs! Here's to many more prosperous years and beautiful songs to come! Happy 44th Birthday Singapore! =D

a round up of my feelings in the past week or so

2009-08-02T23:30:00.000+08:00

Recently, I've been attending many get-togethers and reunions with old friends. And these meetings never fail to make me happy. =)

I can only say: keep 'em coming! And National Day is coming!
Nothing beats celebrating National Day with Family and Friends!
Needless to say, I'm excited! Hence my good mood!

Hope it lasts! Haha! =P

dark secrets revealed!

2009-07-23T00:29:00.002+08:00

Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince was always one of my favourite books from the Harry Potter series. I remember reading it in J2 and being absolutely blown away by it! Because of this, I had very little expectations of how movie 6 would be, simply because I disliked most of the movie interpretations of the books: not because the acting was bad or the feel of the movies weren't good, but the way the original story was cut and butchered to condense all the amazing subtleties that only literature can bring into the films. It has been a long wait for movie 6, and I must say I have lost quite abit of the passion and excitement that I used to have with regards to all things Potter, and I think I shocked a number of friends when I admitted that I have yet to catch the movie til today. Its probably the first time where I DIDN'T catch a HP movie within the first three days of its release!

Anyway, I finally caught the movie today! Movie 6 was admittedly, surprisingly good! As a Potterite, I will always have things to gripe about, but as a whole, it was still quite a well made movie! The acting was good, the dark feel of it perfect, the vision of the world quite accurate. What I didn't like was of course, the usual issues of how the screenplay cut out important plotlines, scenes and lines. I absolutely didn't like the scene of the burrow being incinerated. I felt it was absolutely redundant, and the time spent wasted on that scene could have been used instead to film the original ending in the book, which featured a battle in the astronomy tower of Hogwarts. I also had an issue with the intense focus the film had on the whole teenage romance thing. I felt the film-makers were focusing too much on what was supposed to be a minor subplot in the books; they were banking on something that was definitely going to be appealing to the crowds, and completely neglected what was the main focus of the novel: that of Dumbledore's and Harry's evolving teacher/student relationship, and the way they finally worked together to unravel the mystery of Voldemort's immortality.

I find it a pity that the whole affair with the memories was brought across in such a seemingly flippant way, but to bring all those chapters from the novel into life is going to be an impossibly boring task. It would have definitely been much more entertaining to focus on the hilarious situations that teenage love would bring about. Still, I find it sad that there was so little focus on Dumbledore in this movie. I think he had too little scenes, so much so that I don't feel like the audience actually got a chance to feel for him. I don't think many people even cared that he actually died. His death didn't feel emotional enough. Yeah, that's it.

Still, there were things I did like. Jim Broadman's Horace Slughorn was well portrayed. Daniel Radcliffe's Felix-Felicis-Intoxicated-Harry and Rupert Grint's love-potion-intoxicated-Ron were both simple HILARIOUS. Alan Rickman's Snape was once again, played to perfection. Lavender Brown and Cormac McClaggan were both so well portrayed that I cringed whenever they appeared. Young Tom Riddle was creepy and a picture of controlled evil, just fantastic. And the whole cave sequence was actually quite well portrayed, except for minor changes here and there, and how some heart-breaking lines from the novel were left out.

All in all, it was quite a good movie. As a whole, it was one of the better Harry Potter movies made, but of course, not perfect. None of the movies can ever be perfect, because none of them will be able to capture the magic that the books bring. Its just so different reading it, and letting your imagination run wild. I think these movies help enhance my original impression of the world that the books are trying to create, but in the end, nothing beats one's own imagination when it comes to fantasy. Now all I want to do, is to read all 7 books over again.

what do you see?

2009-07-21T23:01:00.003+08:00

This year's NDP song really sounds like a track of a mystery Coldplay album! Honestly, I kinda like the tune. Its quite a nice melody, but as an NDP song, FAIL LAH. Its too monotonous to be one, and I can already imagine people's reaction to it already. Its like having a super emo-birthday song. How tragic. Haha.
The lyrics are funny as well, and not in a good way! It has absolutely nothing to do with Singapore, and honestly, its quite contrived isn't it? And I feel that the 'hopeful' lyrics just don't go with the slightly flat tune. Quite a mismatch.
Even the Music Video feels weird. Haha. Not a good way to introduce rock music to NDP man.

and so it goes...

2009-07-20T23:02:00.006+08:00

This is a cover of the song 'And So It Goes' by Stefanie Sun, sung during her recent concert here in Singapore. Originally sung by Billy Joel, this song is melancholic but hopeful, and perfectly sums up how I've been feeling over the past 2 weeks or so.

And So It Goes - Billy Joel
In every heart there is a room
A sanctuary safe and strong
To heal the wounds from lovers past
Until a new one comes along

I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense

And every time I've held a rose
It seems I only felt the thorns
And so it goes, and so it goes
And so will you soon I suppose

But if my silence made you leave
Then that would be my worst mistake
So I will share this room with you
And you can have this heart to break

And this is why my eyes are closed
It's just as well for all I've seen
And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows

So I would choose to be with you
That's if the choice were mine to make
But you can make decisions too
And you can have this heart to break

And so it goes, and so it goes
And you're the only one who knows
__________________________________________________

Recently, while watching certain events unfold, I can't help but feel that every single thing that I predicted would happen has finally happened. It feels as if I have utterly lost the war. There were times when I wanted to vent my anger, to scream and shout out loud because honestly, I　couldn't stand watching everything unfold anymore. Most certainly, the 'me' of the past wouldn't have been afraid to do so. Unfortunately, the 'me' of today has been taught well, having gone through many bitter lessons, to not let myself go berserk anymore. Its called 'being calm and matured and collected' they say, because its for the greater good, to prevent the situation from descending into disharmony and unhappiness; truth be told, its really just calculated censorship.

Negativity at its most creative equates to melancholic bliss, while Negativity at its most destructive equates to melodramatic rants. Over the past few days, I've attempted to channel all the dark, negative thoughts flowing through my mind away, into some dark chalice of despair locked away in some corner of the room. But I've obviously failed, because nothing creative came out of it, and here I am, once again, tethering at the edge of another melodramatic rant. That's because, at the end of all those nights, I came to a sudeen realization that I am now really, both literally and figuratively alone. Once again, my watchful silence has failed me. All it has created is a bitter pill for me to swallow. One that I have no choice but to take.

I know what my friends who read this would say, that I'm NOT alone. I know that physically, yes, I am not. I am surrounded by fellow colleagues everyday in the Hospital, but the truth is, emotionally and psychologically, I am absent. Which is why, I am thankful for the reunions that I have been having over the past weekends or so, meeting up with people whom I've missed and longed to meet again for such a long time, doing brainless things like eating roti prata and drinking coffee, rotting at each others' homes, and chit-chatting about life in general, because they've allowed me to be distracted from everything. Between putting up a happy face and being crazy all over again, I've become too busy to remember how horrible I've been feeling. Perfect distraction from the venom flowing through my veins.

The saddest thing of all is that I am fully aware of the source of all my venom. But like a poison tree, it is hard to discard it. Pride, ah the dreaded sin called Pride, is preventing me from letting it go, because deep down inside, I cannot allow myself to step back again.

I have the antidote. But the antidote itself, is poison.

with my rifle and my buddy and meeeee!

2009-07-19T00:19:00.003+08:00

Purple Light - Anon
Purple Light,
In the valley,
That is where,
I want to be,
With my friends,
true companions,
With my rifle and my buddy and me.

IFC sibei jialat
5BX lagi worse,
Everyday,
doing PT,
With my rifle and my buddy and me.

Booking out,
See my girlfriend,
Saw her with,
Another man,
Kill the man,
Take my girlfriend,
With my rifle and my buddy and me.

ORD,
Back to studies,
Got degree,
So happy,
Cant forget,
Still remember,
With my rifle and my buddy and me.

Purple light,
At the warfront,
That is where,
My body lies,
If i die,
Will-you-bury-me,
with my rifle and my buddy and me.
_________________________________________

Watching 'Own Time Own Target' made me realize how much I bloody miss singing this song!

and the answer is...

2009-07-12T22:05:00.009+08:00

On Saturday, the 11th of July, I attended Stefanie Sun's 'The Answer Is...' 2009 Concert. Its her third concert held in Singapore, but its this marks the first time I've gone to watch her perform live in a full fledged concert.

I remember the reasons why I couldn't attend her previous two concerts very vividly. Her first concert was held when I was in Secondary 4, and I remember that it coincided with my Prelim Examinations; needless to say, my parents would never have allowed me to attend her concert then. Her second concert was held when I was 18: at this age, my parents no longer restricted my movements and freedom anymore, but unfortunately, I was still serving my time in Tekong then and the weekend she held her concert just happened to be the start of my field camp.

I love Stefanie Sun. I've been a fan since she first burst into the scene 9 years ago. And to not have been able to catch her live concerts was something I've always lamented. So, when I read and heard that she was finally going to have another concert here this year, I knew, beyond a doubt that THIS was going to be the year where I would FINALLY catch her performing live. And nothing, not even the Orthopaedics Gods that be, can stop me!

The concert was a blast! The stage was incredibly complex and futuristic, the use of the lights and holograms and projection images were amazing. Her many costumes were interesting to watch! Her dancers were fantastic. But most important of all, was her voice! The moment she starts singing those ballads which she just excels in, I felt a rush of warmth gushing through my veins - its a sense of familiarity, of comfort, felt only when you listen to a voice that you've been listening to for the past 9 years. These are songs that evoke so many different memories for me, and to be able to listen to her sing them live was just phenomenal.

Thank you Stefanie for a wonderful night! I can wait to attend your next concert! =)

love fifteen

2009-07-06T17:06:00.002+08:00

Roger Federer never seizes to amaze me. =)

早點回家

2009-07-02T22:10:00.004+08:00

This is still my favourite song from the new Sodagreen album. I love the story behind how it was created, that it was inspired by the composer's Grandparents. And the Grandparents are actually featured in the music video as well! A very meaningful song that reflects a lot of my feelings with regards to the issue kinship and valuing family ties.

I think the most important thing that we should do is to take care of our Grandparents. I have to admit that I probably place more store on being respectful to them than to my own parents! Haha. But yeah. I love my Grandmother and my Grandfather very much, and I absolutely feel that its our duty as grandchildren to do the most we can to keep them healthy, active and living fulfilling lives.

Its one thing just asking about how they are doing and visiting them at least once a week. I think what's more important is making an effort to talk to them, communicating with them, to bring them out for fun trips, to watch TV and discuss the plot twists with them. To have a great relationship with them, that's what truly matters. Its unfortunate that many of our generation and those younger can hardly even communicate with our grandparents' generation, so much so that many of us don't really know how to care for them. Its like we are total strangers. Such is the unfortunate state of things these days.

I just hope that majority of us can recognise this problem and attempt to rectify it before its too late.

WISH LIST!

2009-06-28T15:43:00.001+08:00

Bleach: Heat the Soul 6 Opening movie intro!
I HAVE TO GET MY HANDS ON THIS GAME ASAP! ARGH!

R.I.P

2009-06-26T23:58:00.003+08:00

Well. The weekend is here. But what a strange way to recieve it.

So I woke up this morning to news that Michael Jackson has passed away at the age of 50.

Now... I don't consider myself to be a fan of Michael Jackson. But he IS Michael Jackson. Even if you didn't listen to his music religiously, you would still have heard of him, known a copy of his famous songs and of course, seen his famous dance moves before. I think everyone of my generation, and the generation before ours, grew up with that in built notion that Michael Jackson WAS the King of Pop. We were conditioned to believe that, and nevermind that his later days were plagued by nasty allegations and rumors and failed comebacks, the fact remains that he IS the one and only Michael Jackson and he IS the King of Pop. So his passing feels like the passing of a distant relative... there's this part of you that can't help but feel sad for this unfortunate development.

I think the most unfortunate thing about his sudden death was that he was actually in the midst of preparing his series of farewell concerts in London. Its a pity he will never get the chance to perform the last swansong that he deserves to have, the last chance to go out with a bang, the last chance to savor the love of his fans. I think its awfully sad that the King had to have his last curtain call this unfortunate way.

May he rest in peace.

you know you are not ready to go back to clinicals when...

2009-06-24T16:31:00.002+08:00

1. You wish that you could stay home and watch Wimbledon all day instead of having to make your way to the hospital.

2. You wish that you could stay up late every night to watch Wimbledon matches life instead of having to catch reruns every afternoon.

3. You regret coming back from a H1N1 affected country before the 15th of June.

4. You keep imagining that you have fever, when a thermometer reveals that you only have a temperature of 36.5 degrees.

5. You secretly wish for the Ministry to raise the Influenza alert to Orange again so that you can happily stay at home to enjoy another week of holidays.

6. You rather watch the Ultimatum and Wimbledon than read your Orthopaedics textbook.

7. You wish you could sleep for over 12 hours through the day.

8. You wish you could go back to wearing tees instead of shirts out everyday.

9. You really don't want to talk or encounter a sick patient.

10. You pray for the weekend to quickly come-by so that you can do all the stuff you rather do rather than work and study.

the start of M4

2009-06-21T21:05:00.002+08:00

Starting tomorrow, I will be an M4 medical student.

Sigh. Time sure flies. Its incredible really. Very soon M4 will be over and we'll be doing our electives... and then it'll be the start of M5 and the beginning of our doom!

I start Orthopaedics tomorrow. 2 months of broken bones, worn out joints and various nerve palsies. I personally am not looking forward to it, because the last time I interacted with any Orthopaedic surgeon, I had a very bad experience. These people are generally not the most friendly of the lot.

That said, its sad that I'm feeling so exhausted on the night before I start my Orthopaedics posting. I had an exhausting weekend, not because I was out partying the night away or anything, but it has been such an emotionally draining three days that I feel like I've been infected by H1N1 influenza or something. I am exhausted.

I am on the other hand, quite upset that I had to forgo several social engagements over the past few days. I missed a 71 gathering (argh!) and also a Kbox outing. I also missed my last chance to catch StarTrek in the cinema. I've a feeling that I would feel better if I had went for some of this social engagements, but alas, the call of duty is too strong to ignore. Such is the destiny of my lot.

Another a new day, another new posting, another new semester, a totally new academic year. Time to take the plunge people!

the lives of the rich and famous

2009-06-18T22:30:00.007+08:00

You know you've made it when you see your life story being chronicled on the Biography channel.

I've to admit: the Biography channel on cable is my latest guilty pleasure. The recent changes made to the cable channels my family subscribes to have resulted in the cancellation of old personal favourites like Nickelodeon, Cartoon Network & Disney and the addition of new ones like Animax, Channel V, Discovery Health and of course, the Biography Channel. I thought I would have difficulty adjusting to the sudden disappearance of my favourite channels, but with the recent discovery of how devilishly fun the Biography channel is, it looks like I wouldn't have to worry about having nothing to watch on television again!

The Biography channel (as its name suggests) is a television channel dedicated to screening real life stories: life stories of the rich and famous, life stories of the not so rich and famous. Any kind of life story that is interesting can be screened on the channel, just as long as the stories featured in it are REAL. And I love it! There is nothing more interesting than to learn more about the life stories of these people, to discover the god-awful way they grew up, to find out how they struggled and crawled their way to the top, how they managed to walk onto the right (or wrong) path to success (or non-success) that they are currently enjoying (or not) right now. Insights to the lives that we can never have. Sigh... Just the right amount of material for us to keep dreaming and fantasizing.

Its the kind of channel that potential paparazzi and gossips love. And I, being a gossip myself, absolutely relishes the chance to learn about the lives of all these well known people. It makes me happy to know that they had to pay their dues to make it big, and that some of them, in choosing horrible choices like drugs, sex, violence (i.e a general life of debauchery), actually ended up getting what they deserved, which usually equates to them looking horribly awful or becoming exceedingly broke. I mean, it goes to show that there REALLY is a principle of equivalent exchange in life: what you reap is what you sow, every action generates an equal opposite reaction, there's no such thing as a free lunch ... and blah blah, the list of comparisons goes on. And you learn something from listening to these stories. Its definitely better to work hard first and taste the sweetness that is the fruits of your labour, than to squander everything you have on some quick high.

And speaking of the learning about the lives of the rich & famous, I went to "The Kangxi Emperor: Treasures from the Forbidden City" exhibition held at the Asian Civilisations Museum. Its an exhibition that I've been dying to visit since it started its run on the 13th of March, and I've only gotten down to doing so today.

Isn't he a handsome man? Anyway, the exhibition featured some of the many priceless treasures from the Forbidden City in Beijing, which is of course, now converted into the Palace museum. Most of the exhibits are from the Kangxi era, some of it being Kangxi's personal items. It was a fascinating exhibition, and it offered the visitor just a small glimpse into the life of a giant of an Emperor.

The Emperor Kangxi was one of the Greatest Emperors ever in the History of Imperial China. He, along with his son, the Emperor Yongzheng and his grandson, the Emperor Qianlong, were the three Qing Emperors whose successive reigns witnessed the rise of the Qing Empire to the zenith of its power. And as the first of these three Emperors, his reign sowed the seeds for the Qing Dynasty to undergo this transformation. He was well known to be an enlightened and truly intelligent ruler, a mighty military strategist, a patron of the Sciences and the Arts, an Emperor who truly cared for his people. And just being able to look at some of the artifacts that he commissioned was just fascinating - you really get an impression that this was a man who genuinely sought to improve the lives of his people.

This exhibition allows you to get a small measure of the intelligence and maturity that this great Emperor had, and also the kind of life he lived. Unfortunately, the significance of most of the exhibits would probably be lost if the visitor does not possess some form of knowledge about Kangxi's history in the first place. While the exhibit does allow you to learn a little about the Emperor's story, its offers the visitor too focused and too myopic a view of his amazing life. A full understanding of this amazing man's life and his numerous achievements can only be reached if one is willing to hit the history books. A daunting task, I know, but the lessons learnt, the dividends earned from this investment would surely be worth the effort.

After reading or watching some documentary regarding the life of someone famous or influential, I always wonder what it must be like to be that person. I have fame-envy, I know. But there's no harm in dreaming! In fantasizing! It adds so much colour to our lives and makes it so much more livable!

it finally starts to get interesting!

2009-06-17T22:12:00.006+08:00

<<寂寞光年>> - 刘力扬
是谁从我天空摘走了星星
一转眼眉头聚满乌云
从来快乐悲伤都自己判刑
忘了我也值得被关心

一双手一个梦一路上不断地俯冲
痛到忘了要怎么喊痛

漫长的寂寞淹没我的难过
我的世界是零下的沙漠
其实我也想有拥抱的温柔
融化这颗坚强的泡沫

漫长的等候让人特别失落
锋锐寂寞把天空都割破
有谁能带走这美丽的哀愁
能让我相信被爱的理由
__________________________

Oh the plot twists and turns of The Ultimatum are finally starting to get interesting! Let's face it, I betcha half the people who started watching the show did so because they were hoping to witness the cat-fight of the century between Zoe and Fann. And I'm willing to be one of the first to admit to that!

Honestly, who cares about the blossoming friendship that has been developing between their two characters? We want to know how Zoe and Fann spar against each other, and so far the plot development hasn't allowed them to do any sparring, which is honestly, quite a let down for a TV serial that has been hailed as the 'Head-On Clash of the Screen Titans'. How can it be called that if there's no clashing scenes at all?

What viewers want is BLOOD, unadulterated, unedited and uncensored VIOLENCE and BITCHY cat-fights! So far the plot's been building up to the day when the more conniving of the two characters (which happens to be Zoe's) finally finds out that she's not the true daughter of the rich man whom she calls Daddy, and in today's episode, she finally learns the truth! Its going to be so interesting to see her struggle and scheme to make sure she doesn't lose her status and everything else that she has left. Henceforth, let the dam holding back the tension collapse and let the sparks set the bonfire of cattiness ablaze! I can hardly wait til Zoe's character unleashes her true inner evil! WOOHOO!

I'm sure everyone has their own answer to the question: 'Zoe or Fann?'. I'm inclined to support the former, because she electrifies the screen whenever there's a scene with her in it! She & Li Nanxing both surprised me, because these guys can REALLY act. Fann just isn't that fann-tastic (all pun intended) yet; her acting isn't bad, it just isn't stellar. But I actually like the chemistry between Fann and Tay Ping Hui, and their flirty banter was something I loved as well. But at this point in time, I'm still banking on Zoe to win the ultimate catfight of local television. You go hot momma!

The First One (in over 6 months!)

2009-06-16T16:48:00.000+08:00

WELL HERE WE GO AGAIN!

I can't believe I'm actually back, blogging again. It took me a LONG LONG while to decide if I really wanted to start it all again, because given the chronic lack of time I seem to be suffering from, I just couldn't find any good reason to start blogging once more.

My life's an awful bore these days. Its always work work work, and I didn't really want to blog about that because I absolutely hate blogs that go on and on about every friggin' aspect of their day. I've always felt that a blog should be something to indulge in, something that allows you to squeeze your creative juices and create something phantasmical out of it. And that was definitely not what my previous blog was becoming... it was just going in a wrong creative direction. And that was the reason why I decided to shut it down. Yup. Stefanie would be SOOOOO proud of me! Taking a leaf out of her book and deciding to stop my blog while I attempted to re-discover my creativity and direction in life was about the best thing to have happened to me in terms of my blogosphere activities.

ANYWAY. Not that my blog closure meant anything. Nobody reads blogs these days anyway. Blogging is so so so yesterday. In the present age of Friendster, Facebook and now, Twitter, no one bothers with blogging anymore. Which is a good thing for the folks who still like to blog, because it means less interference and less a need for censorship! Let the mud slinging begin!

So yeah. I've restarted my blog, albeit at a different address from the former. I'm trying to move this blog into a direction which is totally different from what the previous one ended up as. I hope to inject some creativity into the entries, possibly write entries in a more humorous/nonsensical fashion. Also, I'll be actively using this blog as a revision platform for my medical studies as well, so don't be surprised to see the occasional entries filled with medical jargon! But rest assured, the main crux of the entries would still be that of my insights to life as I struggle to sieve through the many many MANY complex emotions that we humans live through in this colorful colorful world of ours. Sigh.

Oh and it is not by coincidence that this blog is entitled 'Life In Technicolor iii'. I absolutely adore Coldplay, so thanks to them for giving me some inspiration with the style and themes of the blog!

The first post is always the lamest because no one is reading it at all. So it feels like I'm just talking to myself. Loser!