and we will one day walk in bitter rain

This weekend has been one of the most trying ever. Its been both mentally and emotionally draining.

Once again, we bear witness to the extreme fragility of life. It brings back memories of the days in Secondary school, where our batch also faced a similar tragedy. I remember very vividly, the tears that some of my close friends had upon attending the wake, and I remember standing there, at a total loss for words, not knowing what to do to make the grief better. 7 years on, and I find myself facing a similar situation, though this time, the emotions are amplified a hundred times over. Because unlike the previous incident, this happens to involve a person with whom I'd known, someone whom I had spent 6 years of my school life, growing up together, making music together; together we were gunning for golds. I remember sitting just diagonally across him in the Orchestra, remember the brief conversations that I had with him throughout these 6 years, remember the cheerful, shy almost bashful smile he gave everyone when he greeted them.

Admittedly, we hardly had much contact since we graduated from junior college. I've never been close to him like how some others were. But nonetheless, it still hurts to know that gentle soul that I first met when we were precocious 13 year olds isn't here with us anymore. And it hurts me more to know that it was such a needless loss, a loss that shouldn't have happen, but yet, a loss that was probably beyond all of our control. Why it happened, perhaps we will never know. But what I do know, is that this has left a void in many people's hearts and perhaps, we will never ever dare view life in such a frivolous manner again.

"When the cold of winter comes
Starless night will cover day
In the veiling of the sun
We will walk in bitter rain

But in dreams
I can hear your name
And in dreams
We will meet again

When the seas and mountains fall
And we come, to end of days
In the dark I hear a call
Calling me there,
I will go there
And back again" - 'In Dreams' from the "Fellowship of the Ring'

One day, we will all walk together in bitter rain. Til then, you'll live on in our hearts and minds, while you find happiness where we cannot follow.

But have no doubt, you will be sorely missed.